I think it's because it's really hard to find a well off job in society. A bad past could come back to haunt someone (I found this especially true for kpop idols). Another thing is that parents don't want to "lose face" aka reputation. This can apply to my family (in the US). Like if I go out partying and doing drugs and other parents find out, my parents would "lose face" in our community. Lol as if I would take the energy away from yaoi to do those things.
I think many parents are "well meaning" because society is the one that will determine their child's future. It is already hard for well raised children to find employment for instance, it is doubly hard for one with criminal convictions etc.
In the past, even we used to be warned off tattoos. "Oh my god, if you must, get it in places that don't show" (Maybe like butt crack tattoo?, on the soles of your feet, if you must!) The big payers won't hire you, they say. I mean even the local deli don't really want to hire one with a visible tattoo gender not withstanding).
In countries where families are still big units, the bad behavior of one person have far reaching impact outside the immediate family, so that's where the "losing face" comes into play. For isntance, oh I can't employ you because you're that man's nephew/niece aren't you? the one that jumped off a building due to corruption etc.
The same for families of a dissident for instance.
In the west, we're getting better at not punishing children of their parent's faults, but as you can see, there are still many who do and it is even more amplified in asian countries where filial and familial connections are still part of the societal fabric in general.
Of course filial and familial connections (that is, having connections to the larger extended family) is not always a bad thing, but it does come with a huge responsibility which looks absurd to us.
But again in the west, it hasn't been that long since we hold the same values (or at least our elders do).
this happaned in Indonesia too. Many parents doesnt report to the police even after knowing their kid being raped or assaulted for the sake of shame and honour. they rather pretend it didnt happened. and if you visit some psychiatrist, people would think you have schizophrenia or mentall ilness so things like therapy isnt really popular here.
I do agree well with you
Yup, a lot of parents in Indonesia choose to marrying off their daughter to the raper than let their daughter marrying someone else cause she lost her virginity to that criminal. Lovely parents ain't they? #welcometoindonesia #af*ckedupsideofourcoumtryprople
Aw f*ck the typo. *af*ckedupsideofourcountrypeople
I understand Japan has different norms and they value appearance and formality and such but... why does it seem parents are afraid to find out the truth about things? I don't want to say "all japanese parents are this and that-" but I find in a lot of Japanese media (manga, anime, books, movies) that parents seem to value society's view of their kids, instead of actually helping their kids. I think this can apply to alot of Asian countries, as well.