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To all university students

MangaLover12 April 27, 2017 6:54 pm

Hey all. I just wanted to get some things off my chest + get advice maybe, so you can skip this question if you are not interested in other people's problems right now. : )

So I am soon going to finish my first year at university, I am in a different country and have only one, at least very good friend here and.. this year has been a rollercoster of emotions for me. I have never felt so depressed so many times, so anxious and alone, felt like nothing had a meening because I have become a complete failiure, and felt appatethic to the point that I wanted to hurt myself...
I just wanted to ask, when do you start getting used to uni? I feel my transition from highschool to uni happened too fast, it is like I was not ready yet, but I am a little happy for this year because I am 3000 km away from my family and can actually start thinking like an emphathetic person, not just a robot that needs to do assignments. However, I do not know if all these moments are all worth it. I wilm get a good diploma if i graduate, but... I just feel all lost right now. And I keep staying in my room if it is possible. For the fist time I have experienced academic failiure, I am not happy with some of the modules I study, I feel so lost... I don't know what I want to do with my life... I don't even know if I want to return here for second year or take a gap year or try studing in my home country.... I don't know anything anymore... ( At leats I have manga to keep me company (⌒▽⌒) )

How were your university years? Did you study in your home country or had to go to another like I did? Did you enjoy uni life? Do you recommened some activities I shold deffinetely try while I am in uni?

Thanks in andvance ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

Responses
    alise April 27, 2017 7:14 pm

    To be honest, I think you should change something. Be it university (maybe trying one in your country is a better idea, you wouldn't feel so lost), maybe the subject you are studying or even you should consider having one year break. You know, mental health is really important, it's actually even more important than your grades because you won't be able make get use of them if you are depressed or stressed all the time. Of course, I'd reccomend you to finish this one year if you have already started and then think it over during the summer break (●'◡'●)ノ But please, please, take care of your mental state! And always put it on a first place.

    Dumpling-san April 27, 2017 7:15 pm

    Hello there, first off, I don't know how to help you, mainly because, I'm still 14 and I can't relate that much excluding all the mixed up emotions, and I don't know if I should butt my nose in other people's business if I'm not going to help in the first place, but I thought you just needed company and comfort until real help comes, haha lol. anyway, you should remember you're not alone, you should send your old friends messages once in awhile or chat with them, or better not your parents? you never know that talking with them would be such a relief, I don't know if this would help you in any way but I'm positive you'll be able to get through this, you should think positive! (how hypocritical lol) I'm sorry if this reply annoyed you, and I don't know what else to say, my mind gets muddled when I'm trying to help someone out because I'm worried if I don't use the right words I'll mess it up even more, I feel the same too, sometimes I just lose all motivation to keep on going and sometimes I ask myself "why am I even doing this?" and etc etc. life is just strange and pointless and meaningless and hard to understand for me, but remember this, you're a beautiful and nice person, haha and be positive! (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ

    Mimi April 27, 2017 7:57 pm

    Hi, I've graduated from technical university eight months ago so I can relate. First of all, I didn't know what I was doing with my life for the first two years. Then I had a change of heart and I really liked what I was studing about. But in the end I was just fooling myself. There were not many subjects I've found interesting and I think I've just lost five years of my life (though I had many friends and it was really fun between lectures). So my conclusion is that: The good diploma isn't eveything. Even if you work hard, you may end up not liking the rest of your life. And to be honest, I was so close to my family that I called every day (or every two days). Later this changed. I got used to separation and sometimes I forgot to contact them for two weeks.

    Anonymous April 27, 2017 7:59 pm

    First, I would suggest you talk to someone offline about what you've been feeling. I'm unsure about your college's facilities but in the US, most colleges will have counselors available on campus. This service is usually free of charge.

    Second, I suggest finding and joining a club or fraternity/sorority. This can help you make friends and expand your social circle. I am an incredibly introverted person, so my first year of college I didn't make any lasting friendships. Luckily my roommates were two of my friends from high school or else I would've had an incredibly lonely first year. My second year I joined a club and made new friends. The rest of my college life was so fun because of them.

    Really, you just have to throw yourself out there. If it makes you uncomfortable, ask your friend to come with you. One of my biggest regrets is holding back and not doing more outside of coursework.

    Anonymous April 27, 2017 8:05 pm

    Oh and also talk to your advisor about how you've been feeling about your classes and major. Lots of students have been through the same thing: feeling lost and unsure about their chosen major. Your advisor can help you decide whether or not to continue with your major and if you decide to change, they will help you through the process.

    naomi April 27, 2017 8:16 pm

    pls don't do the same mistake I did and lose the opportunity you have in your hands. pls don't waste the chance you're given bc it's not easy to have the same chance again. (plus studying abroad seems like a sweet deal to me.) It's normal to feel lost in your first year, everyone goes through the same thing, pls don't feel you're the only one. It takes time to adapt to all the changes. You'll want to run away back to your comfort zone, or you may wanna give up everything but you need to hold on. Think of the tuition or how u may need to repeat a class if u fail, etc. for motivation.
    If you keep looking back (at the choices you already made), you can't move forward. Not even intelligence or talent, *perseverance* is what defines success.