MindlessScribbles

What leads you to suicidal? Is it a heartbreak or losing hope in life? You might want to find some interest or hobby that could keep you busy for a while and engage in life. I don't know if you are under pressure or else since there is too little information to give any specific advice.

Sometimes I can have suicidal thoughts which isn't concerning. I think it might because I was under a pressure and it did affect me. What I did is embrace it and fuck the noise instead. The suicidal thoughts can come visit me but they won't see me dying.

my life is crumbling
Utterly
My binder doesn't hide my chest (I'm trans)
I have nobody to talk to
I'm lonely as heck
I'm low on money
My ex hates me and doesn't want to talk to me (I kind of went back to him)

My only friend is distancing herself for various reasons my family keeps shouting at me for small things and making my day worse
My mom's just exited my life
I'm feeling so depressed and drained lately
I don't know what to do

Have to ask are you on medication of any kind at the moment?

hey, if you want to talk, you can write me a message.

Just my opinion which isn't a professional advice so take it with a grain of salt:

I could suggest you to drop all those people who are against on you. Find someone who will accept who you are, instead of keep living with someone who might be a toxic. It is naturally to desire comfort and companionship when you feel lonely, but maybe you can express that desire on other platform? For example, keeping animals or focusing on your passion/interest.

If you're low on money and you're looking for it then the easy answer is find a job and make some money. I know how the real world works, job can be hard to get. It does get easier if you are less picky about the job. Get the job even if it pay less, fuck life for being stingy but at least the money is flowing in. Keep on track and slowly level up.

If you can forget your ex, then forget about him. That's....doesn't make sense but you have to - forget him. It's hard, heck I know that. Fuck him, I mean, if he doesn't want to talk to you then fine. He is losing that opportunity now and forever. Put yourself on priority.

You can disagree with my opinion.

Moving out and living by myself, adopting a few dogs and cats, and living happily without the concern of family interaction always gets me going. Look deep into your memories and think about that one particular goal you set up for your future. If you haven't accomplished it yet then throw away your suicidal thoughts. I know it's gonna be hard but try.

I don't have much real-life experience in regards to this kind of thing, but I do have an Internet friend who has depression and was suicidal. He's been my friend for 8 years, and in the recent years he often talked about killing himself when we chat. He said that he honestly doesn't know what to do in his life. He feels like it has no worth. He never graduated from a college, and his mom and sisters are terrible at supporting and comforting. He told me that when I talk to him about what's going in my life and just other stuff like Pokemon in general, it makes him forget about the terrible thoughts (for a moment). Before I leave, I tell him that he's a great friend, that I was glad to have met him, that he's on the most open-minded and kindest people I know. He feels good when I say that.

As of now, he goes to therapy for his depression, and he's working on finding a path in life. I think he currently works as an intern, not exactly sure where. He rants to me about his mom and sister sometimes, but he's like, "Well, I'll just move on and just ignore them."

So I don't know if this benefits you, but I guess having a close friend, even just one, will do wonders. I have also heard of people who say that sometimes, things in life distract them from actually committing suicide. For example, I remember one person say that when they had decided to go and kill themselves, they remembered that they forgot to feed their cat. They wondered how the cat will fend if they were gone.

I think the Anonymous reply and the one from Fehlover are both great pieces of advice to follow, and to add, change the things that are making you unhappy, remove yourself from things that are making you depressed, it's never going to be easy but things rarely are, and prioritize, one of the problems you mentioned was low income, which means you have a little income? then work to improve it by looking for work, if you have the skillset to work on something you enjoy then aim for that, for example, (and at risk of sounding cliche) if you like reading or writing, aim for jobs that will surround you with those tasks, if you don't have the skillset to do that then start where you can and then save the money for courses or lessons (i'm not sure what country you are in and what paid education is available so it might be different, but I'm sure there'll be places, if not then I think there'll be online courses, things are a lot more diverse these days) once you've got a more steady income (which won't happen right away) then work on the next thing that's making you unhappy, You mentioned a binder not hiding your breasts, then if you're brave enough save for surgery or look for alternatives.

With the feeling lonely and no one to talk to, I'm positive you can message anyone here who has responded to you, me included, and we'll all make sure you have someone to talk to, as for the people outside of here, I'm not sure if you've tried already but try talking to them, tell them everything that's going on with you, how you are feeling and that you need them to stay with you and help you and not turn you away. If you have already done this then, as hard as it might be, you need to look for people that will listen, do what you have done already and reach out, online is a great place to meet new people but there are also other websites that can point you to places you can walk to and meet with people that are struggling with similar issues, and I know a lot of people hate the word therapy and it's a big step to take and start walking in that direction, but it is there for a reason and the people will be there for YOU.

In the meantime, do things you enjoy as often as you can, I'm going to sound like a crazy old lady or something now by saying my favourite hobbies have ended up being Knitting while watching Sherlock, or some comedic DVD's, but I'm sure you'll have more normal hobbies, and another tip (born from my own OCD) but try and make a day to day routine, i'm not sure if you are at school or work, but set things to do everyday or week by week, I know it sounds a lot like 'just going through the motions' but I find it makes me comfortable to know what I'm going to be doing in the next hour or what day I'm doing my washing, Or feed the cats when I get home, just little things like that to help the days go along.

But lastly, as mentioned before, you can speak to anyone here and we'll be sure to keep you talking, and more importantly, alive, because I'd really love to know more about you, if you ever want to talk :)

If you have modes of accessing therapy then I would highly suggest it. It's generic advice but it's extremely true advice too. Many people who don't have convention problems go to therapists too.

Not for depression
But I am for ADHD

Thank you!
Sadly I'm unable to get animals due to my parents
And currently I have two part time jobs
As for my ex
I made him block me so that I can't message him

Thank you
I'll try my best
Though with education and my age I'm stuck living with my parents for a while, I'm 16, almost 17
I cannot afford to support myself

Thank you!
I was never great at making friends
And currently my best friend is growing distant to me
I think I probably annoy her

I'm hoping to work on education and secure a cushier future but I'm not so sure I have that ability
Currently I have 2 part time jobs

That sounds like me during highschool... It was a very long depressing school year and everyone complained when the teacher partnered them with me cause according to them I was the 'quiet and boring one'. I had some friend though but they all left to some other school. Well it doesn't matter now I guess cause it's over now. Maybe loneliness has an expiration date llol

Hope it ends soon
Was the same through 3 years of my high school days
And is clearly continuing into sixth form for the next two years as far as I can see

owww im so sad for you, im the cheerful type so i have lot of friends, i was always the newbie at school each year since elementary , even now in graduate school, once i was just like you no matter how many people you know outside school its always sad to be alone during classes and during lunch, this is a simple thing and it works ; try saying hello to other people don't be sad in a corner even if you are alone sometimes, try to say hello, how are you? to five of six persons in a day, you will see next time it will be their turn, people are just like you, everyone is happy to know there is someone to talk with. and yes its not complusary to be part of a group, hanging with just 3 or 4 bro its good enough. kiss(づ￣ ³￣)づ

Well, at least you have a friend. I haven't had anyone that goes by that title in the last five years. In fact, I don't think I've talked to anyone who wasn't blood related to me or didn't have the obligation to talk to me (doctor, store clerk, boss, etc.) in the last... nearly four weeks... ╮(￣▽￣)╭

That sucks because I also experiencing the same as yours but I don't really care since I prefer being alone. Why don't you find other alternative? Maybe bring a book or games to play during your free hours. Think of anything that can fill the gap with something you are interested.

If you are seeking a companionship, then maybe improve your social skills. Be nice and observe people. Find ways to sneak in their conversation. Don't overshare though, unless they have gained your trust.