Reject A Love Confession

Agh..! I'm so irritated right now... I know that elders scold u for ourselves still sometimes they should understand us.. I know I'm at fault in my case but what am I supposed to do....
I just given my final yr paper of graduation (delayed exam).. And I didn't prepared fr any competitive examinations like banking , ssc cuz, I thought I'll do it once I'll graduate.. I didn't know corona gonna spill water on that... I have also given high school based job exam ssc, and it's my first time, I know I didn't read fr it but I read chapters from YouTube, how can they accept result from it... They say join a online class course but I can't read from online... And since they know I read mangas and dream to become a manga artist.. They say first take a job and even that they r gonna take my phone(I knw they r kidding) but how can they say that... I used my bro broken phone fr months bcz of certain reasons and now that I got my new phone they r saying we shouldn't have given her that....
First they say which part u have completed.. They I say this and this one.. Then they say have u practiced enough .. Have u bought this books... And I knw they r right but still I feel so hurted time to time... I knw I have 3 yes only to get a job... I know where I stand and just how important a job is fr me.... . . .
Aah ! ...... Now feeling good... Don't knw what I said above but I can guarantee I'm at fault....