):

i get really bad social anxiety, pretty much anything where i’m in an environment where i have to talk to someone overwhelms me and freaks me out. ordering/paying for food or drinks, talking to classmates or teachers, walking in(to) crowded places, eye contact, speaking on the phone or facetime (i haven’t done either since i was 7), and everything i do feels like i’m constantly being criticized. if i smile, eat, or sometimes even breathe in a certain way, i feel like they’re judging me. It’s horrible to deal with and i’ve had panic attacks from simply walking into school or the supermarket before.

now the problem i’m facing rn, my mum just seems to have a thing against me being sick. i have all the symptoms of anaemia and she’s literally given me supplements to help with it, but she refuses to get it diagnosed or let me go to a doctor. This is similar with social anxiety. I know i’ll never treat it myself, but my mum won’t let me get help for it either despite the fact she’s literally seen me have multiple panic attacks because of it. I also can’t just go to a doctor myself because it scares me so much and no one else close to me will go with me. It’s just kind of upsetting that i have to listen to my mum talk bad about parents who won’t seek help for their child if their ill and then see her do the exact same thing to me.