Hair rant

I have been trying to grow my hair out for 5 years now and it has never reached past my shoulders cos I keep getting frustrated with it and end up having it cut short again. I consistently had waist long hair as a child up to 2020 (maintenance was ez i have straight and fine asian hair). And since then ive tried pixie cuts, faded undercut, short bobs, and now the longest ive gotten now is shoulder length hair. And my scalp hurts.

Im someone who doesnt like getting any hair in my face cos it gets itchy then i get breakouts so i always tie my hair or wear a headband. I have always tied my hair loosely so headaches wont be an issue but lately when i tie my hair it feels so heavy. Why does it feel heavy? Its giving me a headache. Ive tried headbands but the firm ones dont fit on my not-so-round head and both that and the stretchy fabric ones alone dont exactly stop my hair from hitting my face when i bend down and i hate it. So tying is necessary.

I've been trying to grow out my hair so i can i can just tie all of it up away from face and vision and to look neat and ready to go even if i just got up from bed. But now my headaches are discouraging me.

So ive been thinking ill go pixie cut again so i dont have to tie hair at all, feels lighter and cooler too. Less shampoo needed too. But styling is annoying. Bed hair is annoying. I dont like to wear caps or beanies to do the job when i have to go out cos its hot where i live. Plus the growing stage is awkward and untiable front hair equals itchy face.

Maybe i should just go bald since i hate the inconveniences of hair in the first place
(But at the same time i wudnt want to get stared at by passing ppl outside)

Anyone else feel the same?