I want to start by saying this is just based on my own experiences, so take it however you want. One thing I’ve noticed is that whenever dating comes up, whether it’s with coworkers or even random conversations with people, I sometimes feel like I have to lie. A lot of people just don’t seem to understand the idea of love without sexual desire. That’s always felt a little strange to me, because people can usually understand having sex without love, but they struggle to imagine love without sex. anyway Because of that, I get a lot of uncomfortable questions like People ask if something happened to me, if I had a bad experience growing up or in a past relationship. Some even suggest I should get psychological help to “fix” it. I’ve also been called a “femcel” before, which honestly fuck them but anyway It’s like people don’t believe that someone like me can just exist this way naturally, or that my identity is not real and or valid. I’ve also run into this in LGBTQ+ spaces when it comes to ace people. Sometimes it feels like were not taken seriously because our identity is seen as too small or “not oppressed enough.” But I always thought the whole point of the LGBTQ+ community was to support people whose experiences fall outside the norm, no matter how visible or common they are.
There’s also a bigger pattern behind all of this that I can’t ignore. Society, both in straight and LGBTQ+ communities, really leans into something called compulsory sexuality. It’s basically the assumption that everyone experiences sexual attraction, and that it’s just a normal, expected part of being human. Because of that, people who don’t relate to that are often misunderstood, dismissed, or treated as if something is wrong with them. ace people basically opt out of that whole thing and are outside the box of our sexual society. Anyway, I have a lot more things I could say about this topic, but I'll leave it like this.
Yo, a genuine question (tell me if i end up being prejudiced, i dont know much about ace and its “field” of sexuality (or, in this case non-sexuality(?)) but i want to learn) if you are just assexual (like, you still have romantic feelings, but just dont really care about sex), how can you tell romantic love and the kind of love that you feel for your friends or even family members apart? And i think that society just thinks that sex is the like “minimum” because, in the end of the day, we are animals, and animals normally have this instinct to reproduce themselves to maintain the species, and theres no need of a real feeling of “affection”, and because of hormones too. And i know that because of consciousness, we are categorized as “intelligent beings” so that would not care much, but theres still traces of that “biological” logic in our society, and that lead to a bunch of prejudices actually (like lgbt+phobia and etc) But like, love romantically, its much more psychological i think, its much more difficult to “build” and to maintain, it needs time, attention, caring, and it is not necessarily something necessary for maintaining the species, its something much more complex. Even more nowadays that the relationships are becoming more and more shallow, people want immediate access of dopamine, of happiness, so its MUCH more easier to just have sex and to get the pleasure that comes with it than to spend time growing real connections. WELL AT LEAST THATS WHAT I THINK pls dont throw hate at me, i dont have any problem with ace people (sometimes i just have questions), and i was just trying to talk about something that catches my interest and to give a harmless opinion based in some philosophical, biological and sociological fields that i learned about in high school（/TДT)/
And if im wrong, pls correct me! But pls lets do it gently (づ￣ ³￣)づ
yeah i mean incels famously want to have sex and noone will have sex w/ them...the people calling OP a femcel are really misunderstanding a lot of things
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Yo, a genuine question (tell me if i end up being prejudiced, i dont know much about ace and its “field” of sexuality (or, in this case non-sexuality(?)) but i want to learn) if you are just assexual (like, you still have romantic feelings, but just dont really care about sex), how can you tell romantic love and the kind of love that you feel for your friends or even family members apart?
And i think that society just thinks that sex is the like “minimum” because, in the end of the day, we are animals, and animals normally have this instinct to reproduce themselves to maintain the species, and theres no need of a real feeling of “affection”, and because of hormones too. And i know that because of consciousness, we are categorized as “intelligent beings” so that would not care much, but theres still traces of that “biological” logic in our society, and that lead to a bunch of prejudices actually (like lgbt+phobia and etc)
But like, love romantically, its much more psychological i think, its much more difficult to “build” and to maintain, it needs time, attention, caring, and it is not necessarily something necessary for maintaining the species, its something much more complex. Even more nowadays that the relationships are becoming more and more shallow, people want immediate access of dopamine, of happiness, so its MUCH more easier to just have sex and to get the pleasure that comes with it than to spend time growing real connections.
WELL AT LEAST THATS WHAT I THINK
pls dont throw hate at me, i dont have any problem with ace people (sometimes i just have questions), and i was just trying to talk about something that catches my interest and to give a harmless opinion based in some philosophical, biological and sociological fields that i learned about in high school（/TДT)/
And if im wrong, pls correct me! But pls lets do it gently (づ￣ ³￣)づ
OMG THE INCEL PART IS SO TRUE? like what do you mean not wanting to have sex makes you an incel oh my god
yeah i mean incels famously want to have sex and noone will have sex w/ them...the people calling OP a femcel are really misunderstanding a lot of things