My best friend of 10 years struggled with depression until she killed herself a few years ago. I have also struggled with depression for a long time and attempted once. I know full well how much emotional labor it can take to stay by someone who is severely depressed, but this? This is cruel. Depression is all about thinking so lowly of yourself that you start thinking no one loves you or that you are alone, and wanting so badly not to be that way that it hurts you.
Depression is genuinely debilitating and twists your thoughts. They feel useless and gross for being unable to even take care of yourself at their worst, and it can be a daily struggle to maintain a healthy baseline even at their best. Your texts only reinforces that and drives them even deeper into this illness.
If being their partner is too much for you, then break up. But don’t weaponize their depression to hurt them. If they attempted or killed themselves tomorrow, what would you do? Instead of doing this, take a minute to gather your thoughts or vent in a journal, because it doesn’t matter what mood you’re in or what the other person has done (outside of being genuinely abusive), you can’t ever take back your words or the hurt they cause. You cannot blame crossing a line on the other person.
I don’t know anything about your relationship, but just going off of these texts, I’d call you toxic at best.
I’ve had to talk my friend out of suicide multiple times, too. I’ve ragebaited them or shocked them out of it (which IS a genuine method and works very well) but this isn’t how you do it.
Threatening a break up in this manner to keep them alive is just inviting a toxic relationship, either on your end or her end because now she’ll rely on you being their partner even more. My friend and I wouldn’t have stayed such good friends if I had done things like that. Someone in our friend group called them out for being super depressed and it being emotionally taxing, which was rough on all of us, but even she didn’t say this kind of stuff, and she was a very blunt and abrasive kind of person. Even so, they drifted apart and weren’t really talking by the time my friend committed.
If you really want to know how you can do better, look up suicide hotline stories. Some of them show you how you can properly ragebait or shock someone out of being suicidal for a while.
Well if I break up with her she'd still try to kill herself, if im there for her she'd still try to kill herself, only when im angry does she truly stop and think for herself. We're already not healthy the moment one of us already got a mental illness and honestly sure maybe im toxic for saying this but I did save a life considering how right now shes willing to actually change once I said all of this. Surprising. I love my gf so much, id do anything for her even if it means i have to be mean just to make her live for me. Yes and that's also a selfish way of thinking. But seriously her suicide tendencies still piss me off and it feels like she'd just rather die than even bothering our relationship. But thanks for the consideration of not knowing my relationship. Because you seriously dont.
THE AMOUNT OF ASSUMPTIONS I GOT LMAO, acting like you guys know her more than i do. Its not that I had zero compassion or whatever. It's just how I genuinely handle her when she's about to kill herself. Like that very night she wanted to DIE. AND has been reposting shit in tiktok to the point where no matter what I say doesn't cut it. She never listens when I comfort her or when I try to call her. At one point it can get frustrating because we talked about this before, I do not want to break up with her but it can get so mentally exhausting for me too. Im not going to be in a relationship with someone who's only plan was to kill herself and make me drown with her because NOTHING ELSE is working. Like why would we date when she couldn't even handle a relaruonship anyway. You guys don't know my efforts. Honestly tho I dont really care much what you guys saw in the surface but im not obligated to explain our relationship on a pornwha site that much LOL so when she was suicidal that night I just pressured her to just break up with me at that point if nothing else wasnt going to cut it anymore because its tiring for me if she doesn't want to change for the better and keeps going back in the same loophole of suicide attempts.
This is truly sickening, I thought it was going to be showing the mental hardships, but still feeling genuine compassion and connection "Stop me rn cause im about to say things that will really hurt"????? You see yourself getting frustrated and recognize that these things are hurtful and yet you decide to do it anyway? Genuinely what is wrong with you, "I still love her tho" do you? This is so fucking selfish, I hope she leaves you
Well tf you want me to say, exactly to someone who never listens when someones there for them? Im the one constantly having to reassure her that its going to be okay and that im always here if shes not doing well but she never opens up her walls and never tells me anything and before I even know it shes already planning on killing herself and when I try to stop her she gets pissed at me AT ONE POINT JUST BREAK UP WITH ME IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR OUR RS! Thats where my anger came from, but tbh we did make up. And ofc I also apologized to her for starting off with pressuring her to break up with me, its that she can get really frustrating at times where I had to resort to saying shit like this just to make her open up to me.
Well tf you want me to say, exactly to someone who never listens when someones there for them? Im the one constantly having to reassure her that its going to be okay and that im always here if shes not doing we... selfcest
You are clearly the very last person she should be opening up to. As someone who struggles with trust issues, hearing something like what you said even once would be incredibly damaging. Honestly, youre putting yourself in too high of a position, she needs more people in her life that actually know what to do when she's struggling instead of guilt tripping her. If you have to resort to be being an asshole for her to anxiously open up, is it even worth it? Plus putting it all on her to end the relationship is insane, if you want it so badly do it yourself, you keep saying she doesn't take responsibility for the relationship, why are you putting yourself through this?? Misery loves company I guess
im sorry girl was ur point here that ur loved one struggling w suicidal ideation should actually be removing people from her life so they don't feel bad when she khs?
"we actually made up" girl if she wasn't already going thru some shit she should dump u oh my god, wdym made up do u read ur own texts?
Well no shit that's my whole point too if shes just going to kill herself atp just dump me because truly she isnt my responsibility as a person and that if she doesnt want to get better just break up with me. Everyday I try so hard to keep up with her yk. Thats where my anger genuinely came from. But yeah we made up by really talking out both our feelings, at one point i just really needed to pressure her to open up to me. But well we made up and Im not obligated to show how we made up
Well no shit that's my whole point too if shes just going to kill herself atp just dump me because truly she isnt my responsibility as a person and that if she doesnt want to get better just break up with me. E... selfcest
ok then break up with her. If you cant handle her and don't have the space to be there for someone in this kind of pain just leave her alone.
Do you really think making her feel bad for trying to find comfort in the people around her is doing anything other than torturing her?
you're not obligated to show how u made up but u sure as hell felt comfortable posting abt how you yelled at her over text for being in pain. I genuinely wish her the best, this is so sad
ok then break up with her. If you cant handle her and don't have the space to be there for someone in this kind of pain just leave her alone.Do you really think making her feel bad for trying to find comfort i... Big tiddy goth gf
Dont wanna lol, and trust me I wish her best more than you do considering im the one in a relationship with her. She'd kill herself if I break up with her actually, and yeah I can't really excuse myself for showing that screenshot huh. I didnt expect a lot of people to actually see it LMFAO ill just show her this thread later, she has an account here too she knows whatever tf I say in this site
this is obviously a toxic relationship and my advice for you is to break up and apologize, or try to improve yourself cuz saying this stuff to your partner who is suffering isn’t gonna make anything better.
this is obviously a toxic relationship and my advice for you is to break up and apologize, or try to improve yourself cuz saying this stuff to your partner who is suffering isn’t gonna make anything better. sunnyfunnyrunnybunny
Not really things got better actually once I said all this. But I guess I should've said that shes the type to never open up or listen to actual advices or the type to enjoy comfort. I mean I thought it was a given considering shes suicidal and depressive. And I did apologize, I said some shitty things that night but it went well. Not every relationship has to be the picture perfect bullshit yall think it is just for relationships to get better. Yall are so quick to assume shit when you guys do not know her as well as I do Id never in my life say this to someone whos actually willing to listen to advices and gets comforted by words that say "im here for you" "please vent to me" "you can tell me anything and im willing to listen" trust me ive tried all of that. Im the most patient person ever not until that night again. This is like her 4th attempt and her 4th fucking suicide letter. And still never saying SHIT to me. I dknt even wanna break up with her but atleast see my pov first lol
Not really things got better actually once I said all this. But I guess I should've said that shes the type to never open up or listen to actual advices or the type to enjoy comfort. I mean I thought it was a g... selfcest
She’s probably avoidant and struggling with suicidal ideation, if you’re not going to break up with her I can only hope that you try to be there for her. I understand how suffocating relationships like that can be but try to be nicer about it. You never know how much you cherish something until it’s gone
If my bf said any of that to me i’d break up with him so fast. try and have compassion for your partner clearly they are going through it. this is nasty
GOOD. Actually, that'll put a weight off both your shoulders then. That wasnt my case for my gf. And I dont know why you guys assumed that I'm like so abusive but genuinely this shit has layers
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My best friend of 10 years struggled with depression until she killed herself a few years ago. I have also struggled with depression for a long time and attempted once. I know full well how much emotional labor it can take to stay by someone who is severely depressed, but this? This is cruel. Depression is all about thinking so lowly of yourself that you start thinking no one loves you or that you are alone, and wanting so badly not to be that way that it hurts you.
Depression is genuinely debilitating and twists your thoughts. They feel useless and gross for being unable to even take care of yourself at their worst, and it can be a daily struggle to maintain a healthy baseline even at their best. Your texts only reinforces that and drives them even deeper into this illness.
If being their partner is too much for you, then break up. But don’t weaponize their depression to hurt them. If they attempted or killed themselves tomorrow, what would you do? Instead of doing this, take a minute to gather your thoughts or vent in a journal, because it doesn’t matter what mood you’re in or what the other person has done (outside of being genuinely abusive), you can’t ever take back your words or the hurt they cause. You cannot blame crossing a line on the other person.
I don’t know anything about your relationship, but just going off of these texts, I’d call you toxic at best.
I’ve had to talk my friend out of suicide multiple times, too. I’ve ragebaited them or shocked them out of it (which IS a genuine method and works very well) but this isn’t how you do it.
Threatening a break up in this manner to keep them alive is just inviting a toxic relationship, either on your end or her end because now she’ll rely on you being their partner even more. My friend and I wouldn’t have stayed such good friends if I had done things like that. Someone in our friend group called them out for being super depressed and it being emotionally taxing, which was rough on all of us, but even she didn’t say this kind of stuff, and she was a very blunt and abrasive kind of person. Even so, they drifted apart and weren’t really talking by the time my friend committed.
If you really want to know how you can do better, look up suicide hotline stories. Some of them show you how you can properly ragebait or shock someone out of being suicidal for a while.
Well if I break up with her she'd still try to kill herself, if im there for her she'd still try to kill herself, only when im angry does she truly stop and think for herself. We're already not healthy the moment one of us already got a mental illness and honestly sure maybe im toxic for saying this but I did save a life considering how right now shes willing to actually change once I said all of this. Surprising. I love my gf so much, id do anything for her even if it means i have to be mean just to make her live for me. Yes and that's also a selfish way of thinking. But seriously her suicide tendencies still piss me off and it feels like she'd just rather die than even bothering our relationship. But thanks for the consideration of not knowing my relationship. Because you seriously dont.
THE AMOUNT OF ASSUMPTIONS I GOT LMAO, acting like you guys know her more than i do. Its not that I had zero compassion or whatever. It's just how I genuinely handle her when she's about to kill herself. Like that very night she wanted to DIE. AND has been reposting shit in tiktok to the point where no matter what I say doesn't cut it. She never listens when I comfort her or when I try to call her. At one point it can get frustrating because we talked about this before, I do not want to break up with her but it can get so mentally exhausting for me too. Im not going to be in a relationship with someone who's only plan was to kill herself and make me drown with her because NOTHING ELSE is working. Like why would we date when she couldn't even handle a relaruonship anyway. You guys don't know my efforts. Honestly tho I dont really care much what you guys saw in the surface but im not obligated to explain our relationship on a pornwha site that much LOL so when she was suicidal that night I just pressured her to just break up with me at that point if nothing else wasnt going to cut it anymore because its tiring for me if she doesn't want to change for the better and keeps going back in the same loophole of suicide attempts.
Youre the one who posted this with no context bb
just break up with her. she deserves better.
youre acting like suicide is selfish that’s the problem
This is truly sickening, I thought it was going to be showing the mental hardships, but still feeling genuine compassion and connection
"Stop me rn cause im about to say things that will really hurt"????? You see yourself getting frustrated and recognize that these things are hurtful and yet you decide to do it anyway? Genuinely what is wrong with you, "I still love her tho" do you? This is so fucking selfish, I hope she leaves you
Well tf you want me to say, exactly to someone who never listens when someones there for them? Im the one constantly having to reassure her that its going to be okay and that im always here if shes not doing well but she never opens up her walls and never tells me anything and before I even know it shes already planning on killing herself and when I try to stop her she gets pissed at me AT ONE POINT JUST BREAK UP WITH ME IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR OUR RS! Thats where my anger came from, but tbh we did make up. And ofc I also apologized to her for starting off with pressuring her to break up with me, its that she can get really frustrating at times where I had to resort to saying shit like this just to make her open up to me.
You are clearly the very last person she should be opening up to. As someone who struggles with trust issues, hearing something like what you said even once would be incredibly damaging. Honestly, youre putting yourself in too high of a position, she needs more people in her life that actually know what to do when she's struggling instead of guilt tripping her. If you have to resort to be being an asshole for her to anxiously open up, is it even worth it? Plus putting it all on her to end the relationship is insane, if you want it so badly do it yourself, you keep saying she doesn't take responsibility for the relationship, why are you putting yourself through this?? Misery loves company I guess
dang bruh u're so selfish
Being suicidal is also selfish
no it’s not. your a pos
im sorry girl was ur point here that ur loved one struggling w suicidal ideation should actually be removing people from her life so they don't feel bad when she khs?
"we actually made up" girl if she wasn't already going thru some shit she should dump u oh my god, wdym made up do u read ur own texts?
Well no shit that's my whole point too if shes just going to kill herself atp just dump me because truly she isnt my responsibility as a person and that if she doesnt want to get better just break up with me. Everyday I try so hard to keep up with her yk. Thats where my anger genuinely came from. But yeah we made up by really talking out both our feelings, at one point i just really needed to pressure her to open up to me. But well we made up and Im not obligated to show how we made up
ok then break up with her. If you cant handle her and don't have the space to be there for someone in this kind of pain just leave her alone.
Do you really think making her feel bad for trying to find comfort in the people around her is doing anything other than torturing her?
you're not obligated to show how u made up but u sure as hell felt comfortable posting abt how you yelled at her over text for being in pain. I genuinely wish her the best, this is so sad
Dont wanna lol, and trust me I wish her best more than you do considering im the one in a relationship with her. She'd kill herself if I break up with her actually, and yeah I can't really excuse myself for showing that screenshot huh. I didnt expect a lot of people to actually see it LMFAO ill just show her this thread later, she has an account here too she knows whatever tf I say in this site
I’m ngl you’re in the wrong for this
this is obviously a toxic relationship and my advice for you is to break up and apologize, or try to improve yourself cuz saying this stuff to your partner who is suffering isn’t gonna make anything better.
Not really things got better actually once I said all this. But I guess I should've said that shes the type to never open up or listen to actual advices or the type to enjoy comfort. I mean I thought it was a given considering shes suicidal and depressive. And I did apologize, I said some shitty things that night but it went well. Not every relationship has to be the picture perfect bullshit yall think it is just for relationships to get better. Yall are so quick to assume shit when you guys do not know her as well as I do Id never in my life say this to someone whos actually willing to listen to advices and gets comforted by words that say "im here for you" "please vent to me" "you can tell me anything and im willing to listen" trust me ive tried all of that. Im the most patient person ever not until that night again. This is like her 4th attempt and her 4th fucking suicide letter. And still never saying SHIT to me. I dknt even wanna break up with her but atleast see my pov first lol
She’s probably avoidant and struggling with suicidal ideation, if you’re not going to break up with her I can only hope that you try to be there for her. I understand how suffocating relationships like that can be but try to be nicer about it. You never know how much you cherish something until it’s gone
Babes why would you say that to someone suicidal i understand how draining having a mentally ill partner can be but you shouldn't be saying this stuff
Well its a last resort to make her stop her bullshit so why not
If my bf said any of that to me i’d break up with him so fast. try and have compassion for your partner clearly they are going through it. this is nasty
id kill myself just to prove them wrong
GOOD. Actually, that'll put a weight off both your shoulders then. That wasnt my case for my gf. And I dont know why you guys assumed that I'm like so abusive but genuinely this shit has layers
youre crazy for saying that, genuinely
The things you do for relationships amirite
im saying you’re 100% in the wrong and should have never said that shit
If I never said that shit she's probably dead right now
ure still in the wrong, this is hella toxic