Baldstarion's question (12)

or do you just need validation from the opposite sex

if they were your children?

One of my homies slipped and drunkenly confessed his feelings for me yesterday at midnight. We aren't as close compared to our other homies in the same grp but he's the nicest guy i know, he became my baggage carrier when i was cosplaying two times and he's already been helping me with school related stuff way before that, so now im conflicted asf. I really want to ask when, how and why he likes me, but i dont think bro wanted me to know in the first place cause he aint bringing shit up this whole time. I dont wanna second guess his true intentions into becoming homies with me but i dont want to be the one to bring shit up as well. I dont even know what i should feel

so, im the one who asked the apparently "biphobic" question y'all call. first off, yall are quick to call this "biphobic" when the question is meant to ask the BISEXUALS themselves on how they feel about their own sexuality and if you're not, then dont answer and dont feel "offended" for us. if you are sure of your sexuality and you dont feel the same insecurity, then dont answer. i experience this constant doubt about my sexuality because you cant just magically confirm your sexuality, especially when people even in your own community are trying to erase your sexual identity!! telling you you're either straight or gay and you cant be "both". people can answer the questions about their insecurities if they want to!! and dont throw the word "biphobic" around because its downplaying the actual biphobia we are experiencing. if this question offends you when you're not even bi, meaning you dont share the same lived experiences, then you need to read the actual definition of "biphobia" again. if i was as offended as y'all, i could even call y'all the one who's BIPHOBIC because yall are invalidating a question from a bisexual person. i didnt have to put my sexuality on the question, cause i thought it was obvious enough that the question was for bisexual people who might feel the same insecurity as i do which is totally valid. yall are hella quick to insult people just because you dont know them in real life

what are your countries' beauty standards?

before y'all come for me, please read my whole post first and the sources that i cited. this post is purely about fetish, porn/smut material content or "yaoi"/"yuri"/"hentai", since they're basically the same thing. this isn't meant to defend nor offend anyone. im just here to spread knowledge and information that i learned and found, since we tend to misuse some words on certain circumstances.

so i see a lot of people here discussing about whether or not getting turned on by yaoi/yuri (basically PORN) when you're straight is a fetish/fetishizing lgbt people. first, we need to know about the ACTUAL definitions of the word. you can find it here:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_fetishism
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/fetish

emphasize on a particular object, a clothing or nongenital parts of the body, meaning things/body parts etc. that ARENT MEANT to arouse you like feet, back, underwear, shoes etc. porn/smut in general isnt included here, since pure porn/smut is literally MADE to arouse you. it helps you explore what makes you horny and what does not. it's fine if some people don't find any particular porn arousing, there are some who just watch it out of curiosity, but it doesn't change the fact that any type of porn/smut is still made to arouse a person. that's why any type of porn itself is not a fetish, rather it can make you develop one.

sources:
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sexualitytoday/201805/why-does-pornography-exist%3famp
https://fightthenewdrug.org/5-things-porn-labels-as-a-fetish-but-theyre-actually-completely-normal/

now, lgbt people (like me) want to know why straight people like to watch gay/lesbian porn. let's talk about straight men watching lesbian porn first. im just going to quote this article about straight people consuming gay/lesbian porn material: "To the extent that lesbian erotica is popular, it can be explained by the fact that men are most aroused by visual cues that emphasize youth and downplay drama and emotional complexity. Lesbian porn, therefore, works for straight men by “doubling up” those visual stimuli, Ogas explained. The only thing better than one nubile, personality-free woman is two of them."

for straight women watching gay porn, I'll quote from the same article: "Unlike most men, Ogas says, most gay and straight women have an emotional, narrative component to their erotic fantasies. Michael Bailey, a psychology professor at Northwestern University who has studied arousal, said when they’re asked by researchers, women say they don’t get turned on by sex scenes featuring two men. However, when researchers measure their levels of genital arousal, women seem to equally enjoy erotica featuring two women, two men, or a heterosexual couple.

“Their genitals get aroused, but that’s not necessarily what they feel in their heads,” Bailey explained."

the link to the article: https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theatlantic.com/amp/article/472521/

let's try to know what fetishists ACTUALLY do when they fetishize lgbt people/minorities or anyone in general. To fetishize a person, as a verb, is to make someone the object of the sexual fetish based on some aspect of their identity. fetishization also includes having an obssessive devotion to something. im pretty sure you all have seen this kind of people in this site openly and PASSIONATELY talking about how hot the "top" is for doing xyz to this "bottom". spending hours and hours of consuming yaoi/yuri for unhealthy reasons. passionately talking about shipping REAL people together, etc.

another situation is when they see a certain type of people on a normal setting as arousing. when they immediately get sexual fantasies just by looking at them and they are constantly trying to look for them in real life/on the internet just to idk, stare at them? and get pleasure while doing it?, then it becomes a fetish.

basically, a person having a deep sexual interest towards another solely because of their sexuality/race or a certain part of their identity, is what makes them a fetishist.

not all fetish are bad though just as they're not all "harmless".

BUT PLEASE, as much as possible, don't just openly talk about your fetishes or boast about them. it can make people who dont have the same fetishes as you do, uncomfortable. if you think your fetish is not only harming you, but everyone else around you, then please seek therapy. sadly, we cant rid of our fetishes, but we can make them harmless by seeking help from a professional.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/standard-deviations/201605/no-you-cannot-eradicate-fetish%3famp

so i was forced to join my school's volleyball team back in 7th grade, because they were lacking players. in 8th grade, i didn't want to play anymore, but the coach said that they needed me and i couldn't say no. i thought i would only play for my school's intramurals, but it was too late when the coach told me that i would play in regional. i was scared asf, but luckily we placed 1st. i was about to quit in 10th grade, but the coach guilt tripped me.i didn't want to fail my team,but i was having anxiety that it affected my play and we lost.
my fear of losing was so severe that i cant play volleyball anymore, i cant even watch any sports tournaments, because the sounds in the court scare me. i even dropped reading/watching sports mangas/anime, cause i relate to most of the characters, and it gives me flashbacks. i want to go back playing, but i just cant.

is it possible to have a phobia on sports, specifically volleyball?

do you guys remember sucking/chewing your clothing when you were a kid???
if so, do yall also remember the taste of it??

cause i do and i remember it tasting sweet and now i feel disturbed for doing that disgusting shit as a kid.

When you feel melancholic/kinda wanna kys? It's 1:18 a.m here and im feeling kinda gloomy lolol i need that suicidal music rn

to add mayo in mac n cheese?

Yall feel your reading glasses getting moist on your face? It's disgusting but im also blind