Fia

I was wondering if there were any yaoi manga where the pronagonist is in love with a guy but then ends up realizing he had feeling for guy #2 all along (like for example a supporting friend or someone else he initially never considered as a romantic interest). Basically like Heroine Shikkaku but yaoi.

Ok so this is gonna be REALLY vague so if you can't put up with it I understand.

I've been wanting to re-read this yaoi manga since I was a kid, but then lost the only image of it I had before I learned how to use the internet to look for it, that's why I never found it again. What I remember is:

- Both uke and seme are adults, they work for the same company with the uke being either the seme's boss/superior or just a co-worker that has worked there for a longer time (his senpai);
- The uke is blond/has light colored hair since it the black&white manga pages his hair wasn't colored in. He might have had it parted in the middle but I'm not 100% positive;
- The uke looked and behaved really cold (to the point that 14 year old me thought he was supposed to be the seme) but was revealed to have either anxiety/paranoia or experienced some kind of trauma that made him really scared of some certain situations;
- I also have this vague memory that the first time they made out (and maybe then had sex? idk) was on a couch after the uke had a panic attack/moment of freaking out and the seme was like i gotchu senpai but I have no idea if this actually happened or if I'm just confusing it with some other manga.

I don't even remember why I've been looking for this manga for all this time but now it's just a matter of principle.
To whoever helps me out I'll give a cookie so pls help thx byes.