It's a great story. I'm hoping for a great ending, one in which Ilay loses the uke and lives a miserable long life full of suffering, and the uke gets his revenge on Ilay and then lives a happy life with someone else, a true healthy love. Please, don't disappoint me author! I will wait till then to rate it. If they end up together it will be one star, no matter what. I don't care about Ilay at all.
06.09.2024 I skip this before because I thought 3P or orgy but I saw some clips and decided to give it a try. I spent like whole day reading this until 93, in all fairness it is a decent one, a little bit slow burn with derange characters and less smexy scene so I REALLLLLY READ THE DIALOGUES which is rare of me nowadays since most of the time it is AH, AHHHH, CUM, DEEEEEEEPER so I enjoy those with stories and this is not even painting a whole picture yet or maybe I am hoping for more great conniving stories or conspiraciedd etc... ANNNND felt like art changed in the last few latest ch... art now resembles that other manhwa with meh weak seme
upon further reflection, i think i might have gone a bit too harsh in my criticism of this manhwa. IT's not the worst thing out there by far, anyways (looking at you, Sadisitic Beauty)
I like this I just wish they were better at expressing their feelings to each other. Also I wish the silver hair would notice his feelings more and understand them better the guy really loves him needs him but he doesn't seem to understand what he's feeling or what it means. He seems to not be emotionally developed And our guy never thinks he could really care about him and when he gets close to that thought silver hair does something to ruin it. Every time. While I get it I wish silver hair in better words would say what he's feeling and why even if he doesn't understand it our guy could tell him. Same goes for the main because he's been delusional about his feelings from the get go.
After all he always thought Silver was the sexiest and loved his hands even wanted to be friends but then multiple times got mistakenly told he was wrong when it's obvious silver hair treated him differently. Everyone tells him but even now he never believes it. He was also more hurt by ilay and by contrast barely cared that his crush was riding ilay. He was more hurt to realize Ilay didn't care. (Not true). Heck if you analyze are guy and even listen to him later he would have done to Ilay what he did to his crush when he tried to have sex with him. The guy had legs to kick and a mouth to bite yet he didn't. When he ran away he missed Ilay. Honestly he just wants Ilay to actually care about him. He wants him to reciprocate his friendship and his considerations but unfortunately our guy doesn't understand that. So it's frustrating. Our guys just so emotionally stunted that it's frustrating. Honestly I was hoping Ilay knew but apparently even till the end he was clueless even to the point his body reacted. His body knew but he didn't. He's such a an instinctual being guess that makes since. But at this point could our guy forgive Ilay or believe anything he says? I'm betting he could and probably the words to he has great instincts though when it comes to ilay he never believes them. He trusts illays messed up words instead because those words are what he would find easy to believe. Sigh main that doesn't mean it's the truth.
He was interested in you from the get go on the phone. He gave you his name he messed with you like a child even took your favorite toys just to get your attention and to ruin that for you. He lets you survive and acts calmer and alters himself for you. He repeatably points out your his first on many things. Like being Gentle and cleaning up things he never cared about except those things go back before he said it. Like the simple fact he didn't just have sex with him at first he was trying to take it slow till the main freaked him out then he broke and all his bad personality came out because he's afraid of losing him. Of being hated. Of having no connection. He's even afraid of his own obsession and doesn't want to kill him because he doesn't think it's worth it. Not your normal yandere there.
Ilay is very messed up but I still like him and I can tell the main guy does to. It's sad though thanks to ilay hes probably going to doubt his feelings at this point and so will the readers probably since illayss trying to brainwash him they might even say it's Stockholms or something. But dang our guy was a sucker for illay since the day he saw his hands. Do you remember how wholesome he was with his crush but I remember a unholsome sexy thought about what those hands could do to him and that was while he liked his crush. Even about illayss body when supposedly he was so wholesome he just never noticed. Maybe he's dense. He thought he cared more about his crush but even from the get go he was more moved by a simple book that he'd even sit and let all his fear disapte next to a killer just because he was reading you know on second thought the mains not that sane. He even wanted to be best friends with him after he did all that and felt bad for him for being lonely. I agree with the lonely but honestly he's not that sane. Honestly with illay hes a comon case of you should read his actions not his words he'll say he doesn't care and even harsh things while showing you the complete opposite. And that's because he doesn't understand feelings. So he says why he's observed or what he thinks makes sense when in reality it's the complete opposite. It's frustrating because the main guy believes those words. He even misunderstood why illay messed with the crush when it was obvious he just didn't want our guy to be apart of that and wanted to ruin his viewpoint of him. (Mostly because he himself could see it and he was jealous). Just no matter how many times he sees illayss actions he never believes them and honestly that hugely speaks of insecurities.
I've been there. When it's someone you don't care about as much it's easier to believe they might like you but if it's someone more important then you start thinking how could they care about me? I'm not worth anything? How do I even compare? A million different things run through your head and it's easier to believe them over what your seeing because it would be to scary if anything else was the truth. So you run. You've got so many barriers so many pains and blocked it so many times that you stopped noticing till you do and your scared stiff because you realize this person could really hurt you. You really care. And that's scary because they could break threw everything and you realize they already have. And your just not ready for that so you freak.
Sometimes we have so many barriers up we never notice we're even doing it till it's to late. The main guy definitely has barriers and there to do with his brother and being compared. And Everytime he realizes Ilay got past those barriers he gets upset but it's because he thinks he realizes Ilay doesn't care so he runs but Ilay chases time and time again and some of that's just persistence. The main is someone who wants to be chased. He even secretly likes he's getting illays attention that he's being treated differently. That illay can't just leave him alone. Even if he hates it. He did exactly what the main wanted. He just doesn't realize any of this about himself. And even if he did illays being to harsh for him to realize. Because the mains to busy trying to prove he has a normal mentality when we all know that's never been a thing. When you've never had anyone's attention having someones avid attention is probably ecstasy. Well maybe someone mentally stable wouldn't like the means but seriously I doubt that stability with the main character. I'm pretty sure he likes his crazy doesn't want to but something mentally unstable is what keeps making him step into that arena and let everything go if you'll be my friend. And while that sounds nice and all makes you seem like the best human being even illay knows it's not normal and says he has no danger sense.
