I never once confessed this to anyone, but after reading this and typing this post I'm tearing up. I was being sexually abused for many time, by not one but 3 of my cousins and sometimes by an old man who worked as a security guard. And the sad fact is, i am not the only one victim here. It happened so many times that i never truly remember when was it started, but it's strange that I still remember clearly every time they did it, even tho my memory normally doesn't work probably :) but it scared me so much cause i still want to feel the enjoyment of sex after that. I mean i never once do it with someone, in one hand i disgust it, one hand i really want to try it. The case i'm in is so much similar to the MC. I never want anyone to know about this, and i blame myself sometimes because i thought it was my false that i let it happened, cause i never truly tried to escape that situation, cause i always frozen up in that kind of situation. I never thought it traumatized me so much, I always try to fulfill my life with all positive things that my friend always said i'm look like a positive vitamin pill. But the truth is, I don't. I don't want to remember about the past, but it keeps haunted me, and i just realize that i will never escape from it. The story is so sad for me, because I realize that i am not the only who suffered that way.
Is that the body wants to feel good and all that, but when we think with our mind and see all the things going on is fked up. Please, fighting! Keep going, there are people outside who need help and people who are healing wounds.. send u a big hug!
I never once confessed this to anyone, but after reading this and typing this post I'm tearing up. I was being sexually abused for many time, by not one but 3 of my cousins and sometimes by an old man who worked as a security guard. And the sad fact is, i am not the only one victim here. It happened so many times that i never truly remember when was it started, but it's strange that I still remember clearly every time they did it, even tho my memory normally doesn't work probably :) but it scared me so much cause i still want to feel the enjoyment of sex after that. I mean i never once do it with someone, in one hand i disgust it, one hand i really want to try it. The case i'm in is so much similar to the MC. I never want anyone to know about this, and i blame myself sometimes because i thought it was my false that i let it happened, cause i never truly tried to escape that situation, cause i always frozen up in that kind of situation. I never thought it traumatized me so much, I always try to fulfill my life with all positive things that my friend always said i'm look like a positive vitamin pill. But the truth is, I don't. I don't want to remember about the past, but it keeps haunted me, and i just realize that i will never escape from it. The story is so sad for me, because I realize that i am not the only who suffered that way.