Argh! That has to be one of the most frustrating questions. And this one was even worse!
ML: Why didn't you tell me? FL: I tried, but you wouldn't talk to me. ML: If you really wanted to tell me you would have found a way. FL: I DID try to tell you! I even went by your house and you were already in America with your new girlfriend. ML: Oh, that was a lie. There was no girlfriend. I went to America for brain surgery. FL: What? Why didn't you tell me? ML: Well, I didn't want you to worry. I was going to come back to you when I recovered, but after the surgery I almost died and was in a coma for 3 weeks. FL: Oh, that's serious. So why didn't you tell me when you got back? ML: I figured you had moved on with your life, but I couldn't forget you, so I decided I was going to get you back by hook or by crook. FL: So, let me get this straight... I tried to call you for 2 weeks and you wouldn't pick up, because you left for another country with no way for me to get ahold of you and told them to tell me you had a new girlfriend (you couldn't have said you went for a business trip or something like that?), you had brain surgery, nearly died and were in a coma for 3 weeks, then never let me know when you came back, and you're telling me I could have gotten a hold of you if I really wanted to? ML: If you'd told me, my family and I wouldn't have missed the first year and a half of my daughter's life. That was so selfish of you. I'm so hurt by your selfishness that I don't even feel like I need to apologize for how I ruined your dream or for how I hurt you... then OR now. You should have told me.
Granted, she could have also sent a letter which MIGHT have been waiting for him when he got back, so she didn't exhaust all her possibilities. If she'd been told in America with his fiancee, I might have understood her backing off and not trying other methods, but I don't think 'new girlfriend' is enough of a reason (beyond emotional write off) to let him off the hook. That said, just once, I'd like to see the ML say, "Did you try to get a hold of me? Of course you did. You probably even told my people how important it was, but I'd told people to block any contact from you. I can't believe how stupid I was. I deprived myself of so much."
Argh! That has to be one of the most frustrating questions. And this one was even worse!
ML: Why didn't you tell me?
FL: I tried, but you wouldn't talk to me.
ML: If you really wanted to tell me you would have found a way.
FL: I DID try to tell you! I even went by your house and you were already in America with your new girlfriend.
ML: Oh, that was a lie. There was no girlfriend. I went to America for brain surgery.
FL: What? Why didn't you tell me?
ML: Well, I didn't want you to worry. I was going to come back to you when I recovered, but after the surgery I almost died and was in a coma for 3 weeks.
FL: Oh, that's serious. So why didn't you tell me when you got back?
ML: I figured you had moved on with your life, but I couldn't forget you, so I decided I was going to get you back by hook or by crook.
FL: So, let me get this straight... I tried to call you for 2 weeks and you wouldn't pick up, because you left for another country with no way for me to get ahold of you and told them to tell me you had a new girlfriend (you couldn't have said you went for a business trip or something like that?), you had brain surgery, nearly died and were in a coma for 3 weeks, then never let me know when you came back, and you're telling me I could have gotten a hold of you if I really wanted to?
ML: If you'd told me, my family and I wouldn't have missed the first year and a half of my daughter's life. That was so selfish of you. I'm so hurt by your selfishness that I don't even feel like I need to apologize for how I ruined your dream or for how I hurt you... then OR now. You should have told me.
Granted, she could have also sent a letter which MIGHT have been waiting for him when he got back, so she didn't exhaust all her possibilities. If she'd been told in America with his fiancee, I might have understood her backing off and not trying other methods, but I don't think 'new girlfriend' is enough of a reason (beyond emotional write off) to let him off the hook. That said, just once, I'd like to see the ML say, "Did you try to get a hold of me? Of course you did. You probably even told my people how important it was, but I'd told people to block any contact from you. I can't believe how stupid I was. I deprived myself of so much."