agree… i feel like it is more complicated to understand seunghyun’s behavior likeee i don’t understand the connection and progress from their first encounter. Is it that the author change the plot mid chapters or the backstory and their first meeting after the weeding is a little bit complicated for me to understand.
(excuse my long take, oof)
seunghyuns behavior is Definitely soo much harder to understand. it feels so erratic and like yuta told him after he broke the mirror, seunghyun was acting different and unpredictable and that he needed to get help because he makes him anxious. and surprisingly, for once in a toxic bl, thats just what seunghyun did and got therapy. even asked dooshik for advice lollll (just because hes done this - all the shit hes done is still not excused) i have thoughts on seunghyuns behavior too but since seunghyun really is just harder to understand he still confuses me too.
i think seunghyun only knows the gang life. grew up in it and its his work and he takes that work very seriously, its most of what he thinks about. and he is overtly someone who has been exposed to toxic masculinity in this type of life. thats likely affected how he controls his emotions, or the way he bottles them instead. he was just (sexually and even emotionally) attracted to yuta and he translated that feeling into anger instead. and..dude is definitely homophobic against his own sexuality. its like one of those people who think being gay is a choice because theyre choosing not to, yaknow? (he could be bi, he could be whatever he is, but hes so not straight lol i kind of think him being a virgin all this time means hes a gay in life long denial but...i aint him or the creator lol so whooo knows?)
all these years, seunghyun has thought that yuta chose to be with the kujo family and not to come to him. he never went back to confirm if thats what yuta really said or wanted. so ten years pass and yuta appears in front of seunghyun and drugs him and then assaults him. seunghyuns a gang leader. hes not going to excuse that shit from a person he had a fling with ten years ago (& also that he felt ashamed of being attracted to a man) who he thinks left consensually. so hes gonna act like its work and hes gonna treat yuta like a thug would. and then when yuta changes up his approach by acting like hes a damsel in distress and that he loves seunghyun after he had ed and hurt him, seunghyun knows that yuta is playing him and that its all fake. (but maybe some of its real, actually, bc yuta deserves to feel hurt) and i think seunghyun was looking for the kind of reaction that yuta is giving him in this latest chapter. like. it doesnt make sense to seunghyun that yuta would accept that kind of treatment from him and then cry about it and not be angry, because that wasnt the introduction he presented to seunghyun when they remet and yuta drugged him. but seunghyuns latest change in behavior is likely from the therapy and advice from dooshik. or its all a manipulation. we'll see. hes definitely more confusing lol
for a genuine discussion of different povs to consider, id even like to know other peoples takes if they differ from mine. this is all just my interpretation
lmao this is great (was lil shock seeing the length of the paragraph lmaoo)
i mean, yuta is definitely having a mental episode. but i think theres logic, and for sure a trauma reaction, behind his episode. the biggest reason hes freaking out is that yuta has been faking these past weeks being with seunghyun anyways. i think the goal has always been to involve himself with seunghyun and deeply affect his life and then fuck him up by seccumbing from his brain injury. but now seunghyun knows about it so theres no more surprise to his potential death (which he probably wants to die is another reason he wont get the surgery, but now with seunghyuns surprising interest in yuta and learning his secret, seunghyun will likely convince or force him in time to get care) ...and now seunghyun is acting like he cares and loves yuta out of no where after weeks of spontaneous aggressive "im angry every time i look at him" sex. followed by being avoided!!! last thing seunghyun was doing to yuta was avoiding him! so he's confused by his appearance in hong kong and his sudden lnterest and is upset that things again, aren't going the way he predicted it. he has flash backs of the trauma of sadistic sexual abuse in the beginning of the chapter and tries to impose that same feeling onto seunghyun thinking "what does he know about me?" its as if hes trying to show what he learned and experienced, getting physically abused and then being molested. though its even more likely that he is venting all of his anger to not understanding seunghyuns unpredictable behavior towards him and all the pain and abuse hes had to endure the last ten years by being abandoned by him. i dont think yuta is going through some random switch or a bipolar episode or that the bullet is affecting his judgement. i think it makes sense that he lash out like this, although i dont think hes making the right choice. but, seunghyun seems to accept that he deserves a bit of back lash from yuta for abandoning him years ago and more recently ing him and abusing him instead of taking the path of learning what really happened these last ten years and why yuta chose the abuse of kujo instead of coming to his side. (he probably didnt even get presented with a choice, i bet seunghyuns hyung decided yuta wasnt good for him and sent that other guy instead of seunghyun to break them apart)