This is such a realistic depiction of compulsory heterosexuality. It’s frustrating seeing MC unable to confess his feelings, but it’s even more tragic knowing the psychological pressure he feels to pretend and lie.
It’s an automatic defence mechanism that he can’t turn off because of how desperate he tries to blend in. He’s so deep in pretence that he ends up playing stereotype of the overly-horny straight man. (With that, he even adopts the misogynistic language straight men use when he talks his female classmates. Which reinforces the idea that homophobia and sexism are intertwined.) Keeping in mind the setting and time period (I believe it’s rural Japan in the 90s), it’s even more understandable why MC sabotages himself again and again.
I wish more yaoi showed this sort of internal conflict, instead of using the surface-level cliché where the characters go “I’m not gay!” for a little bit before “giving in”—as if the denial of being gay comes from surface-level bias rather than the deep-rooted fear of discrimination and social rejection.
Pessimistically, I believe countless stories like this have happened in real life, but without the reunion, closure, or even self-acceptance. As such, I’m glad the author gave this story a happy ending
This is such a realistic depiction of compulsory heterosexuality. It’s frustrating seeing MC unable to confess his feelings, but it’s even more tragic knowing the psychological pressure he feels to pretend and lie.
It’s an automatic defence mechanism that he can’t turn off because of how desperate he tries to blend in. He’s so deep in pretence that he ends up playing stereotype of the overly-horny straight man. (With that, he even adopts the misogynistic language straight men use when he talks his female classmates. Which reinforces the idea that homophobia and sexism are intertwined.) Keeping in mind the setting and time period (I believe it’s rural Japan in the 90s), it’s even more understandable why MC sabotages himself again and again.
I wish more yaoi showed this sort of internal conflict, instead of using the surface-level cliché where the characters go “I’m not gay!” for a little bit before “giving in”—as if the denial of being gay comes from surface-level bias rather than the deep-rooted fear of discrimination and social rejection.
Pessimistically, I believe countless stories like this have happened in real life, but without the reunion, closure, or even self-acceptance. As such, I’m glad the author gave this story a happy ending