Well said!! I enjoy the story but I also understand how their relationship is toxic. I really hope that we get a whole 360 change in his behavior…… but from the post that I’ve read( from ppl claiming they read the novel) it’s not happening…… a girl can dream :|
Agree. The amount of boudaries that everyone crossed towards her in her closest family and the ML is insane. The people that seem to treat her as an actual human are the wizard and the knights of his castle, which is wild for a man that is so incredibly infatuated. He's tooooo in love with the ideal of how he wants her to live and feel instead of actually respecting her as a person with wishes of her own. For him we at least understand where he's coming from, but damn what a misery to be in a relationship with a man like him.
Thank you! Seriously, I’ve been saying this for ages, and it’s frustrating watching people completely dismiss it! Maxi and Riftan’s relationship is fundamentally imbalanced. That’s not at all a subtle or "nuanced" reading—it’s baked into how both characters interact from the start. What really miffs me is how some fans interpret Maxi’s developing sexuality, especially into Book 2. They point to it as proof that she was “always been just as horny as Riftan,” when that completely ignores the context the story itself establishes.
First, Maxi grew up abused, sheltered, and grossly uninformed about sex. She doesn’t enter the relationship with a healthy understanding of intimacy, desire, or consent. Her early sexual encounters with Riftan are marked by hesitation, confusion, and discomfort. For fuck's sake, their wedding night ended in martial rape (it did, read the novel). That is *not* mutual passion by any means. That’s just someone trying to navigate something they were never given the tools to understand in the first place.
Second, she does not discover her sexual. She adapts to *Riftan's*; there's a clear difference. She doesn't do it because the dynamic she has with him is healthy, but because she’s been conditioned to. She internalizes the idea that as a wife, she is expected to endure whatever her husband demands, even at the cost of her own comfort. That’s not empowerment. That’s survival behavior shaped by a misogynistic framework she was raised in. And with Riftan being her only sexual experience, of course, she eventually starts to respond differently. When your entire understanding of “love” and intimacy is filtered through one person, especially one who is intense, possessive, overwhelming, and borderline abusive, your baseline shifts. What looks like “growing desire” on the surface can just as easily be adaptation to pressure and normalization of that intensity. That’s why calling their relationship “romantic” feels so off to me. There isn’t a healthy, mutual foundation there. What you have instead is two people trying to fill emotional voids through each other:
Riftan channels his insecurity, trauma, and need for control into possessiveness and sexual intensity. Maxi then interprets that intensity as affection because it makes her feel seen and wanted in a way she’s never experienced before. They’re not meeting each other as whole people. They’re responding to what the other represents.
At best, that’s codependency. More realistically, though, it reads as trauma bonding, where attachment is built through emotional imbalance, dependency, and distorted perceptions of care. You can find that dynamic compelling from a narrative standpoint, sure. But pretending it’s healthy, mutual love without acknowledging all of this context? That’s where the analysis falls apart.
Take my upvote, cuz you earned it girl.
I was really into it at first!! Then I was in the same boat, I started seeing comments about what happens in the novel, and I slowly started noticing more and more negative behaviors throughout the story. I almost hope they change it a bit to not be as identical to the novel :(
I feel so bad for Maxi. I've seen people call her pathetic and other nasty words, but we gotta look at where she came from, how she grew up. It's as if people are forgetting she was abused by her dad all the time before she left to be at Riftans castle. I really, really hope the artists change the story a little (to differ from the novel) to give Maxi a little more strength and self-empowerment. She deserves that after all she's been through :(
I really wish more people would read what you have to say (because I'm sure many don't fully read these smh) because you explained it perfectly. I can't even remember if Riftan ever apologized for how he acted on their wedding night?? The fact you even have to say that it's true is upsetting, because I'm sure there are people who disagree that *that* scene was an issue.
It's severely common for first night wedding ceremonies to happen like that in many cultures. Meanwhile, I've read other stories or comics where the husband purposely goes out of his way to make his new wife as comfortable as possible. Some even pretend that they had sex, because it's such a common belief that newlyweds have to have intercourse the night of their wedding. I think that definitely showed us a sneak peak into the type of person Riftan is. He's a knight and known as the best of the best. It's, sadly, not surprising that he's a brute. Hell, even I was blindsided by his looks at first, but when I read about what happens in the novel and started processing his actions, my mind did a complete 180°.
His looks definitely play a huge role in why so many people defend him and his actions. It's a known trope, where people are attracted to a murderer, abuser, rapist, simply because they're "hot," despite knowing what they've done (take a look at Ted Bundy, he had fangirls during his court sessions). In cases like this, I always ask myself, "if he was not conventially attractive, how would this story be viewed?" Because honestly, if he were "ugly," I doubt he'd have this many people defending his actions.
It's 100% true that her sexual behavior, actions, etc, are based off of what she's encountered with Riftan. It's literally the only form of sexuality that she's experienced, so she's come to learn, or rather belief, that that is what is considered normal.
Oh, BELIEVE. ME. I actually made an entire TED talk explaining how their wedding night was 100% marital rape, simply because I grew curious to the repetitive claims by fans that the moment was "non-consensual for both parties." It's buried under other comment threads I've made here, lol, but I also made a reddit post about it. I did my own digging, and even subjected myself to the scene in the novel (which is how I wound up reading the rest of the story) and when I tell you I was appalled, I fucking was. Of course, the scene itself was watered down in the manhwa, but the novel version was explicitly graphic. No way was that scene not clear enough for fans to then turn around and turn Maxi and Riftan’s first time together into a fucking debate. Maxi’s discomfort and distress were painfully obvious, both in the main story as well as from Riftan's perspective—because I'm certain I'm going to get many Riftan girlies telling me off about how his POV added more nuance to the scene when it really doesn't. If anything, his POV makes him look *worse,* because now we're aware of his thoughts during that moment, and it reveals that he was, in fact, fully aware of Maxi’s discomfort but did absolutely NOTHING to stop it! In fact, he doubles down and tells her to simply endure it. But yes, let's cut him some lack because he doesn't know any better, right? Despite being a grown-ass man who's also 6 years older than Maxi. I had mentioned in my rant that the best thing he could've done for both himself and Maxi was to fake their consummation upon him realizing how uncomfortable and downright terrified Maxi was the whole time. If he claims his love for Maxi is "so deep"—having been "in love" with her since childhood, then why couldn't he provide the bare minimum of comfort for the woman he's apparently adored for years?
I forgot what story it was that did this, but there was a manhwa I skimmed through a while back that depicted a scene where, similarly, the ML was supposed to bed the FL after having married her. It was really fucked up, because the girl herself was mentally impaired (not sure if she had mentally age regressed, but it seemed like that was the case), so badly that she didn't even know how to verbally communicate. She had been forcefully tied to the bed, so it was pretty damn clear that her comfort and bodily autonomy were completely inconsequential to her caretakers. The ML, actually being a decent person, rather than having his way with the FL, instead untied her and gave her space to fall asleep next to him. He even knew to think ahead of time because he was aware that consummation was mandatory for them, so it's implied that he had used his own blood to fabricate their consummation. He did this for a woman he hardly knew because he genuinely felt awful about the inhuman conditions he had found her in. This is how you write a scene like this. There are definitely other ways to do it, but I truly loved the way the moment played out. I was actually about to cry while reading the scene because I had thought the ML was going to go through with raping with the FL, so I was relieved to see him treating her like an actual human being. Riftan, by contrast, was belligerent, rough, and incredibly inconsiderate of Maxi’s distress. When comparing the scenes from both stories side-by-side, the comparison is literally night and day, It's truly sickening that Maxi’s first sexual encounter has to be up for debate.
I also 100% agree that Riftan’s looks play a major factor in why his actions are constantly excused and even defended. The funny thing is, I myself was not physically attracted to Riftan at the start. This was before I even discovered how much of an awful ML he was. I genuinely felt this sort of "uncanny-valley" feeling whenever he was present in the manhwa. Something about his appearance just rubbed me the wrong way, and I still can't explain what exactly it is about it that gives me the ick. Maybe it's because the artist tries too hard to make him look attractive, idk. In hindsight, this was probably foreshadowing for how I'd end up feeling about him for the rest of the story, because after seeing his true self (the explosive, temperamental, and emotionally immature side) he became even uglier in my eyes.
Your last paragraph especially made me feel so validated, because I've been saying this for ages now—ever since I first read the entire banquet scene in book 2, specifically—and my words would ultimately fall on uncaring ears. Riftan essentially spends about half the book avoiding and emotionally stonewalling Maxi over a decision she made that was meant to protect him, and in the end, despite her growing anger towards him, Maxi would ultimately fault herself for allegedly not "loving him enough" and not considering HIS feelings. He ignores her and dismisses her attempts to communicate until she's then forced into petty provocation, and what does that earn her? A whole week where Riftan sexually assaults her, resulting in NOTHING BEING RESOLVED OR ADDRESSED, and no accountability or even a whisper of an apology ON RIFTAN'S PART, because of course, Maxi being the soft-spoken, demure wife, she's apparently responsible for both her emotions and actions as well as Riftan's. That means she needs to prove just how sorry she is to Riftan. How exactly? Oh, obviously by rewarding his prior sexual assault by giving him a fucking blowjob, even after the physical and emotional toll his assault had visibly taken on her!
Honestly, it's the indifference and blatant disregard of my analysis that hurts more than any name-calling or witch hunt. You can disagree, yes, but just give me a valid reason for why you *do,* instead of telling me that I'm "wrong" simply for criticizing your beloved male lead. I question how many of these female readers would actually tolerate a man like Riftan in real life, because in fiction his insufferable behavior was enough to make me rage constantly about him online, lol.
Lol, I replied to your main comment instead of your reply by accident. But just adding quickly here, don't worry. I made sure to take my first response to you and shared it in the main comment section, lol. I don't care how much hate it'll earn me. I'm fed the fuck up with keeping my mouth shut about problematic characters and themes in manhwas just because the fan girls hate what I have to say. Other than My Beloved Oppressor, I've yet to read another good romance manhwa that DOESN'T fucking romanticize and normalize gross and abusive behavior.
Reading you and Rabbitmage's comment literally healed my frustration, I'm never able to put it in proper words and you all are Mashallah so eloquent with it.
That 360 change will never come and honestly I fear it'd be too late into the story if he does, 147 chapters from the Manhwa and there is barely any changes, now imagine this but worse in the novel( I haven't read the novel, My sources our from Rabbitmage
Funny, I think when you act a fool and are a horrible person even tho you're conventionally attractive, that attractiveness in my opinion, becomes so painfully distorted. Like uncanny and malicious, this is why a lot of women( Myself included ) when we see a man who isn't necessarily the most ATTRACTIVE man, but he's got a wonderful and kind soul, his funny, and has a great personality, you can't help but fall, But yk what, you'll realize that people separate the awful personality from his looks, thats why despite Riftan's issues, people still like him and disregard his awful personality. Me personally from the start, I've disliked Riftan, I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt truly, especially when Bato was still here and people in the comments were swearing on their lives that Riftan has more to him, its a slowburn and everything will get better, 147 chapters in, Where is Riftan's character development, if anything I'm seeing Maxi grow more and I've come to LOVE her so much, Maxi isn't free from her own flaws( Not necessarily a fault on her part ) but she's consistently growing from them, Riftan only now, in future episodes will learn that he has a misconception about Maxi's life as a Duke's daughter, but that doesn't really change anything since he continues to act a fool even after this problem ( What I've learned through Rabbitmage
Oh girl the more you continue to provide even more and more on Riftan the more my hate for him grows, and my hate for him started even before learning about these things. I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks that Riftan wasn't attractive, you mentioned that the artist tries to hard to make him attractive yeah, Its actually this and the fact that he's build like a Bottle, yk, like a Small head and a big body? So it looks even weirder( Idk whats some of these Artists obsession and their characters being built like that, and also for the women ) and paired with his personality it just puts everything together. I say this because usually whenever a ML is built like this regardless of their personality, I genuinely can't stand it, there are a few exceptions, and thankfully if the ML's personality is likeable I can tolerate it.
I think a lot of people are missing the point when they defend this relationship, so I’m just going to say it plainly: something can be framed as “romantic” in a story and still reflect unhealthy or non-consensual behavior.
The issue that me and many others are trying to speak about isn’t just THAT one isolated scene, it’s a pattern. You have a female lead who was abused her entire life, has little understanding of relationships, and has been conditioned to obey and endure. That kind of background heavily impacts how someone responds to intimacy, conflict, and obvious power dynamics.
When you put that kind of character in situations where she’s clearly uncomfortable, unsure, or saying “wait” or “stop,” and those boundaries are ignored, that’s where people start calling it what it is. Even readers who like the story acknowledge that there are scenes where consent is questionable or outright absent (look it up).
And that’s really the core issue:
Consent isn’t based on whether someone eventually “goes along with it,” feels conflicted, or even develops feelings later. Consent requires clear, ongoing willingness, and it can be withdrawn at any time.
I also think it’s important to recognize that this story reflects dynamics that exist in real life. People in abusive or imbalanced relationships don’t always react in obvious ways. They might comply, rationalize, or even blame themselves. Many, many women defend their abuser and their rapist, and many do things for their abuser/rapist that people might question "why did she do that for him if he did that to her?" That doesn’t make the situation healthy.... it actually shows how much manipulation and conditioning can affect someone.
You can still enjoy the story, analyze the characters, or even like the development, but denying or minimizing those dynamics entirely is where the problem starts. When we call their relationship toxic, we are not hating the series, we are trying to be honest about what's being portrayed.
I'm not going to be surprised if people leave replies that make it obvious they didn't fully read what I wrote, but at this point, it's concerning how some of you can't have a proper, mature discussion and understand your "opponents" viewpoints. It's literally not about opinions at this point. There are fundamental principles, like consent and bodily autonomy, that aren’t subjective. Ignoring a partner’s refusal or distress isn’t “debatable,” it’s a violation, and treating it otherwise only contributes to harmful misunderstandings. <3