JK and Garam are in the wrong. One because he is too impulsive and reckless without taking time to consider his lover perspective, the other because his insecurities are eating him alive and making him self sabotage his relationship and also being very condescending of his partner feelings and efforts because or that.
Garam came from a terrible environment, yes, but as someone who also came from one that doesn't give you a Free Pass into being an insecure dick and hurting your SO.
JK was angry because of the birthday issue, but he still prepared something he thought was romantic and beautiful for his boyfriend. Garam reacted very badly to it. He didn't even explain it well. In a third person eyes, (and probably JK) looks like reluctance to a commitment. Like, you don't tell me about your birthday, you don't even want my heartfelt gift, so what is this relationship about them? What do you want from me?
JK was also in the wrong for reacting so violently, instead of trying to talk it out, which made it worse. But okay, couples fights, misunderstandings are a thing. They took a night to sleep separately and 'cool off'.
Then the next day the issue with coming out to his friends. Here both of them are also in the wrong. First, JK, that's not a place to come out. You can do so in a more private place. Maybe he thrust his friends that much, maybe he really is that confident and doesn't give a shit, but there are time and places for everything.
Second, Garam. He isn't wrong for not feeling comfortable coming out. HOWEVER he is wrong for forcing JK to stay in the closet with him without any kind of plan for the future. He is JK boyfriend, not his fuckbuddy. Here he is actively sabotaging his relationship trying to use the moral high ground of "this is for JK's sake" when is not. It's just him. He is scared and instead of expressing his feelings and thoughts to his lover he, instead, resort to patronize his "this is for your own good" "I know better" mentality (a self protecting mechanism probably) while at the same time showing JK that he doesn't have any kind of plan for the future. No commitments. No nothing.
The rest is just both of them shoveling deeper into the pit of anger, regret, fear and miscommunication. Unless they can properly talk and express themselves this will only get worse. Both are at fault.
/rant over I just love this story. It portrays a very realistic relationship with miscommunication issues. Now they both need to work it out!
JK and Garam are in the wrong. One because he is too impulsive and reckless without taking time to consider his lover perspective, the other because his insecurities are eating him alive and making him self sabotage his relationship and also being very condescending of his partner feelings and efforts because or that.
Garam came from a terrible environment, yes, but as someone who also came from one that doesn't give you a Free Pass into being an insecure dick and hurting your SO.
JK was angry because of the birthday issue, but he still prepared something he thought was romantic and beautiful for his boyfriend. Garam reacted very badly to it. He didn't even explain it well. In a third person eyes, (and probably JK) looks like reluctance to a commitment. Like, you don't tell me about your birthday, you don't even want my heartfelt gift, so what is this relationship about them? What do you want from me?
JK was also in the wrong for reacting so violently, instead of trying to talk it out, which made it worse. But okay, couples fights, misunderstandings are a thing. They took a night to sleep separately and 'cool off'.
Then the next day the issue with coming out to his friends. Here both of them are also in the wrong. First, JK, that's not a place to come out. You can do so in a more private place. Maybe he thrust his friends that much, maybe he really is that confident and doesn't give a shit, but there are time and places for everything.
Second, Garam. He isn't wrong for not feeling comfortable coming out. HOWEVER he is wrong for forcing JK to stay in the closet with him without any kind of plan for the future. He is JK boyfriend, not his fuckbuddy. Here he is actively sabotaging his relationship trying to use the moral high ground of "this is for JK's sake" when is not. It's just him. He is scared and instead of expressing his feelings and thoughts to his lover he, instead, resort to patronize his "this is for your own good" "I know better" mentality (a self protecting mechanism probably) while at the same time showing JK that he doesn't have any kind of plan for the future. No commitments. No nothing.
The rest is just both of them shoveling deeper into the pit of anger, regret, fear and miscommunication. Unless they can properly talk and express themselves this will only get worse. Both are at fault.
/rant over I just love this story. It portrays a very realistic relationship with miscommunication issues. Now they both need to work it out!