don't hate me, this is just me ranting the feelings away. this is so fucking mesirable... it made me mesirable

ig i'm twisted as alex, i felt happy when he killed the doctor. my heart literally goes badump. i hate clark for killing alex, and it only made me freaking hate clark more (but alex deserves it and i fell bad for the doc)

mind you, clark could've prevented that to happen (alex killing the doc) he knows how emotional alex is, he FUCKING knows how alex is. his hobbies is the one that is stopping him, his fucking pleasure for his hobby. i fucking swear if he just let the police catch alex, this wouldn't happen (i know he don't want alex to be caught). if he just used his fucking brain that alex might kill someone if he cut things off (ik he wouldn't know), if he just... there's so many what if's.

Now, I can't fucking sleep.