I think his feelings are really complex. I don't think he stopped loving him and he hates and is disgusted with himself for it so much so that he cannot process it. His thoughts and feelings are all over the place right now. He's telling himself it's for revenge or breaking free but part of him wants to be someone special to Guwon and if hes capable of caring about him or thinks of him differently then maybe there's hope yet.

Do yall think Teach wondering abt how much he matters is purely for gauging their plan's success rate or is there something more