It would deeply hurt me if my partner disregarded my feelings to reconcile me with my parents, and unintentionally ended up justifying their actions.
I often see that they have more empathy for their partner's parents than for their partner themselves, almost justifying their behavior but not acknowledging that it's okay not to want them in their life and that it's okay not to forgive someone who hurt you.
It's not a korean thing..it's Asian things..I'm an asian and it's same everywhere..we love and hate our parents..we are so attached with the emotions that leaving or cutting them off seems cruel to the point even if I have swallow poision everyday.. because we grew up that way if we say something that might be hurtful we feel guilty and stuck in same loop. Asian parents has invisible leash around their children.
Wow, that's interesting. It must be difficult too.
I know that relationships with parents are complicated and have a lot of layers and depth in all cultures, but I think that in my context a parent isn't the one who conceives, but the one who raises and cares for you. Sometimes we call the person we feel closest to "parent". I call my grandmother "Mom," in fact my mom and I call her "Mom"
Yeah, thats true its really difficult to cut off your parents no matter how worse they have treated you. Its like something makes you feel guilty or something... and after sometime you cave. I think its an Asian thing. Like it feels surreal to even think of removing your parents out of your life and lets not forget the guilt tripping
I agree, it's not who is giving birth to a child but one who makes the child feel safe.
It's really adorable loveable that you and your mother have safe place. May god protect you all.
This is why many adults stay with their parents even after getting married..only if they're not longer alive or they live away due to career.
I've seen a lot of Korean stories where parents do genuinely bad things to their children, and they're forgiven because they're the parents. And it's always the partner who forces the relationship to be reestablished because you have to forgive because they're your blood, and everything ends up being justified. They don't show the parents having a moral arc or learning something or changing. And it's not the parents who apologize, but the children who forgive, and that's it, everything's fine. And this happens in various media: dramas, manhwa, etc.