Holy fuck this is good writing

Can we just take a moment to acknowledge how amazing the writing is? Like fuck.

He genuinely doesn’t hate Cheol. He wantrd him so badly to go after him, to just apologize so he can get over it and move on WITH him. It didn’t matter that his father, mother nor brother hated him or treated him badly. He barely cared if they knew he was gay. What he cared about was being outed then being forced to sit in what that meant for him ALONE.

So instead of actually healing and sitting with the fact that he’s gay and acknowledging it he resisted it. As a way to throw away Cheol so he wouldn’t have to deal with it. But it turned from anger, to fear and then he used his small amount of anger he felt toward him and used it to hide his fear.

All while yearning for his man back. He ruined his life, started drinking, smoking, gambling, dropped out of college (now I’m speculating) all because he wanted Cheol to come and apologize, take responsibility and love him again all while fearing exactly that.

Internalized homophobia mixed with abused is a BITCH.