Spoiler from Lick me if you can (parenting side story)

I am stating some incidents which were there in the last 15 chapters of the Novel LMIYC. I am seeing so many peopl keep mixing up orders of incidents.
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People keep saying Koi was only separated from the children after the poisoning incident.
But that's not what the novel shows.
Long before Grayson poisoned Koi, Ashley had already started separating Koi from the children because they interrupted the time he wanted to spend alone with him.
When Chase kept wandering through the mansion, knocking on doors and looking for Koi, Ashley wasn't worried about his child.
He was annoyed that Chase is disturbing his quality time koi.
"Damn it, I should have gone outside."
The novel literally says:
"Whenever Ashley tried to spend time alone with Koi, the other children seemed to know exactly what was happening and constantly interfered."
Ashley then thought:
"I need a way."
His solution wasn't to spend more time with his children.
It was to get rid of the "problem."
He came up with an excuse to send Koi away for an audit that lasted six months, keeping him away from the children because he wanted Koi to himself.
This all happened before the poisoning incident.
So the idea that Koi was first separated from the children because of Grayson poisoning him is simply incorrect.
Then, after the poisoning incident, people reduce everything to, "Grayson got locked up because he deserved it."
Again, that's not what happened.
Ashley slapped a little boy repeatedly, cursed at him, and then—
"He even squeezed the boy's neck, intending to suffocate him immediately."
That isn't discipline.

Ashley always used to separate them that Nathaniel noticed. And the very first time Ashley separated Koi from kids was after that Chase knocking the door nd disturbing their time(fwop fwop) time. They keep their children alone with nannies. After 6 months when Koi returned things changed. Then happened the poison incident which gave Ashley full control over the children and Koi and a proper excuse to fully separate them. I know Ash conditions and reasons as well but the methods he has been using were wrong.

The poisoning was undeniably wrong.
But why is it so difficult for some people to acknowledge something the novel itself repeatedly shows?
Ashley failed as a father.
Koi later admits his own regrets and failures as a parent.
Recognizing their failures doesn't erase Grayson's responsibility.
It simply recognizes that a child raised in harsh punishments, emotional neglect, and a completely distorted understanding of love was failed by the very people who were supposed to protect him.
That's not making excuses.
That's acknowledging what the story itself tells us.