Like the seme is definitely pushy and needs to follows boundaries better. But omg the uke doesn't do anything right either. Like I get he has a reasonable fear of being outed, that's not the problem here. The problem is that the uke doesn't even allow their relationship to exist in private. Yeah he's allowed to say that he doesn't want outsiders to know of their relationship, but in private he doesn't even show affection or care for his partner. It's so bad that outsiders think that the uke hates the seme, which like you don't have to act coldly to your lover, you can act neutral and enforce that boundary. Uke treats others with more care than his own lover, like he takes their recommendations, he's friendly, and focuses on them more. The seme wanted rings, the uke is allowed to wear his in private but he doesn't even do that - he literally hid it away. The seme gifts the uke a tie, the uke doesn't have to say it was a gift from a lover but he doesn't use it at all, and on top of that he actively takes another person's recommendation and buys a tie. The uke could just say, someone recommended this tie and I bought it - but he prefers to hide away a gift from his lover. The seme starts acting strangely, even deciding to go home on his own despite his previous insistence to go home together - he doesn't question this change much but that's okay. Uke sees a coworker hurting and helps her out, also okay. Uke then doesn't take the time to send a quick message of hey I'm late and helping someone, he just goes silent. Seme suddenly asks to break up, the uke doesn't question it. He doesn't ask why or if they can work things out - the uke makes up his own mind and says sure.
Like I would understand the uke more if they actually had a relationship in private, but they seem more like roommates with benefits. Not only that, but the fact that the uke is not willing to fight for the relationship just shows that he's not invested in it. The uke is always going to be ready to abandon the relationship, so why did he even agree to date the seme. Yeah the seme isn't perfect and he needs to also listen to what the uke wants, but the distance the uke keeps will never allow them to actually communicate.
And it's kind of funny that the uke doesn't like the seme being friendly with others. Like the seme and uke should be apart, because they should focus on themselves first. Clearly neither is built for a proper relationship. The seme has to be less clingy and has to learn to listen, because he can't communicate when he's focused on pleasing someone else to ease his own anxieties. The uke needs to confront his fears, and no I don't mean he should come out, but he should learn how to deal with his fears in a healthy way. He can't force any future lovers to hide their relationship even in private, that only breeds resentment.
I'm invested but also angry lol
Like the seme is definitely pushy and needs to follows boundaries better. But omg the uke doesn't do anything right either. Like I get he has a reasonable fear of being outed, that's not the problem here. The problem is that the uke doesn't even allow their relationship to exist in private. Yeah he's allowed to say that he doesn't want outsiders to know of their relationship, but in private he doesn't even show affection or care for his partner. It's so bad that outsiders think that the uke hates the seme, which like you don't have to act coldly to your lover, you can act neutral and enforce that boundary. Uke treats others with more care than his own lover, like he takes their recommendations, he's friendly, and focuses on them more. The seme wanted rings, the uke is allowed to wear his in private but he doesn't even do that - he literally hid it away. The seme gifts the uke a tie, the uke doesn't have to say it was a gift from a lover but he doesn't use it at all, and on top of that he actively takes another person's recommendation and buys a tie. The uke could just say, someone recommended this tie and I bought it - but he prefers to hide away a gift from his lover. The seme starts acting strangely, even deciding to go home on his own despite his previous insistence to go home together - he doesn't question this change much but that's okay. Uke sees a coworker hurting and helps her out, also okay. Uke then doesn't take the time to send a quick message of hey I'm late and helping someone, he just goes silent. Seme suddenly asks to break up, the uke doesn't question it. He doesn't ask why or if they can work things out - the uke makes up his own mind and says sure.
Like I would understand the uke more if they actually had a relationship in private, but they seem more like roommates with benefits. Not only that, but the fact that the uke is not willing to fight for the relationship just shows that he's not invested in it. The uke is always going to be ready to abandon the relationship, so why did he even agree to date the seme. Yeah the seme isn't perfect and he needs to also listen to what the uke wants, but the distance the uke keeps will never allow them to actually communicate.
And it's kind of funny that the uke doesn't like the seme being friendly with others. Like the seme and uke should be apart, because they should focus on themselves first. Clearly neither is built for a proper relationship. The seme has to be less clingy and has to learn to listen, because he can't communicate when he's focused on pleasing someone else to ease his own anxieties. The uke needs to confront his fears, and no I don't mean he should come out, but he should learn how to deal with his fears in a healthy way. He can't force any future lovers to hide their relationship even in private, that only breeds resentment.