Why is it unrealistic for a 30 year old to not have experience?
What an odd thing to say. Some people don't want sex without an emotional connection, it's not that complicated or that rare.
I'd agree if him being a virgin was put on a pedestal and treated as some virtue, but here it's simply the result of him not being able to move on from his crush. It's treated as a hindrance if anything.
Forcing yourself into intimacy that you do not want just because everyone else is doing it is not a good thing. If anything it would take away from Woojin as a character who is depicted as a deeply romantic person despite his wild looks.
I've seen both reply and while I do agree with both the fact that it’s not strange at all for a 30 yo to not have experience or not wanting intimacy without love, both of yall do not understand that what I'm criticizing as a avid and long-time BL reader (and romance reader in general because I do believe that there is a link to misogyny in that trope but let’s not open that can of worm) isn’t that but the constant Virgin MC and very experienced ML trope that is overly used all the time.
What I'm saying is that the set up perfectly allowed this trope to be avoided for once. You're missing my point but I didn’t express properly with the unrealistic bit: what I'm trying to say is this was a setup where it was unnecessary to try and incorporate that rather than saying it’s unrealistic to not have experience at 30 yo (and even more unnecessary if they try to incorporate the trope just to have the ML reveal he doesn’t have experience as well cause why all that then).
I mean, you specifically said that you like the story other than this trope so I don't think there's much to misunderstand about your statement. I still very much disagree that this trope applies here at all. So far, absolutely nothing indicates that ML is a player other than MC just assuming that he's experienced. ML showed zero interest in anyone else in any of the flashbacks we've seen so far. MC also isn't out there trying to "protect his virtue" or whatever, he simply can't move on from his first love and so he's unable to start another relationship. I wouldn't be too surprised if it's revealed that both of them faked being experienced just so they could get a chance to be with the person they've been pining for so long. And I don't think it's a trope out of place, this set up is clearly driving the whole plot.
I agree there's plenty of crappy virgin tropes out there but not in this story.
I think you're narrowing down the trope I'm criticizing. I never said the ML had to be a player for it to apply. I'm talking about the broader “virgin/inexperienced MC vs very experienced ML” dynamic and the playboy version is just one variation of it (All squares are rectangles, but not all rectangles are squares kinda thing : a playboy ML is experienced but an experienced ML isn't necessarily a playboy). So saying he isn't portrayed as a player doesn't really address my point.
I also think we're mixing up a trope being well executed or justified with it not being there at all. I understand why Woojin has no experience, and I agree that it makes sense for his character (even though I expressed myself clumsily). My issue was never that his virginity makes no sense or that he should have forced himself to sleep with people. A trope can be perfectly justified in-story and still be a trope and this particular experience imbalance is so often present in romance.
If your point is that we don't actually know whether the ML is experienced and Woojin is only assuming he is, that's fair. But even if the ML turns out to be inexperienced too, that was part of my original point: the trope would be subverted rather than played straight, but the story still chose to use that dynamic by making us (and the MC) believe there was a huge experience gap between them. I'm tired of the setup itself and for me, using that trope only to subvert doesn't make the reveal particularly satisfying.
At the end of the day, this is just my opinion and we can agree to disagree. I'm just frustrated to see this trope being used even in such a good story.
The only thing that I dislike here is the virgin MC vs the ML with a whole lot of experience trope. Bro is 30 yo ffs him having experience doesn’t make him less in love and doesn’t take anything from the story. I hate this trope with my whole being, most of the time they use the excuse that the MC is young at least compared to the ML (or just fboy ML lol he is so crazy omg) but here it’s not even that. Even if they do a whole reveal of the ML not having experience as well, which I doubt, this still would hit as unrealistic. Why can’t they both have experience, one more than the other sure but not Marie Sue and a whole Succubus for once (and I don’t like it that much even when the roles are reversed). Really love this story apart from that.