fuck this made me sob... as someone who has grown up hypervigilant, always watching others to feel "safe" and using their daydreams/imagination as their only safe place because the real world didn't have any, I really fucking relate to ideum. not only that but always taking the blame of others narratives and accepting it but also not realizing that the pain your feeling is really just self abandonment. i dont think ideum realizes how deep he feels when he accepts his moms narrative of his childhood even though there are so many clear signs that he is deeply in pain of being abandoned both emotionally and blamed for simply having a body that is ill. it seems implied that ideum's mother blames ideum for her issues with her husband/ex by saying in this latest ch (14) that ideum's demeanor was "happy" before he became ill. these r just idea's i had while reading lol... i just want ideum to be happy and safe and loved srsly he deserves it:,( <3
fuck this made me sob... as someone who has grown up hypervigilant, always watching others to feel "safe" and using their daydreams/imagination as their only safe place because the real world didn't have any, I really fucking relate to ideum. not only that but always taking the blame of others narratives and accepting it but also not realizing that the pain your feeling is really just self abandonment. i dont think ideum realizes how deep he feels when he accepts his moms narrative of his childhood even though there are so many clear signs that he is deeply in pain of being abandoned both emotionally and blamed for simply having a body that is ill. it seems implied that ideum's mother blames ideum for her issues with her husband/ex by saying in this latest ch (14) that ideum's demeanor was "happy" before he became ill. these r just idea's i had while reading lol... i just want ideum to be happy and safe and loved srsly he deserves it:,( <3