Both are shitty ppl

Finally, a comment I can agree to.

1)You said they both had crappy childhoods and then proceeded to say Riftan was a mercenary(something he chose to do when he was 13-16) and Maxi was was abused(smt she was born and raised into and had no choice but to deal with it her WHOLE life) and got the nerve to compare them like they're the same.
2)Riftan knew more about Maxi then she knew of him. He's been watching her since he was 13. He chose to marry Maxi, she didn't get a choice and she never would have since they live in a society where women are property. So your argument that he married a women he knew little about doesn't make since.
3)As I've already said, Maxi was abused all her life and they live in a society where women are property. Because of this, Maxi was taught and threatened to keep her head down, don't speak, and don't do anything that'll embarrass her father or lower her value. Her not telling Riftan anything was her just practicing what she was taught. How could she trust a man who yells when he's angry and who's knights glares and speaks badly about her, when the first man she's every met(her father), showed her nothing but hate.
4)Maxi is definitely not a shitty person and based on your post, it doesn't seem like you have in proof. Her having trauma and trust issues should never be a reason for her "suiting" an obsessive and controlling man.

1) riftan had no parents saying becoming a mercenary is a good thing and as a kid not a definition of a crappy childhood is a wild statement. On a scale of shitty childhood atleast maxi had a roof over her head and parents and a place to call home, even if it’s not to OUR definition on home, she got smt. Riftan had jackshit, nothing buddy was a peasent feel like ur not able to see two sides of the story which if ur reading this book at the age it says you must be above, I got nothing else to say except wow that’s shocking.
2) by knowing someone that means you talk to them, interact with them, know their wants and needs, not just seeing them around town that isn’t the knowing I was talking about. He chose her cuz she was pretty and he went to the dragon conquest FOR HER again u can do that for someone u met (love at first sight) that still DOESNT MEAN YOU KNOW THEM.
3) in the case of maxi as u say in the time period riftan would be THE BEST husband AT THE TIME. If you think he is shitty COMPARED to the husbands AT THE TIME, again you got bigger fish to fry over your literacy and reading skills (NOT SAYING THAT MINE ARE THE BEST JUST MAYBE SLIGHTLY BETTER).
4) lists of times maxi has been NOT THE BEST partner (ONLY TALKING ABOUT MAXI NOT RIFTAN AS TO ANSWER YOUR STATEMENT): signing up to become a mage without talking it out or even bringing it up in any convos, went to war and put her own life at risk to see a guy who been going to war for years, communication skills are terrible (yes they both struggle with this but am only talking about maxi), when in the first season (I believe) he asked about her childhood and she didn’t mention it at all (I understand it’s a hard topic for her but a hint would have been lovely), helping riftan out after he said he didn’t need help (this only applies in the situations where she puts herself in danger which in turn puts more than HERSELF in danger).
You can go on and on nitpicking my opinion but then again you gotta realize am looking at both sides am only saying this about maxi cuz so many ppl be attacking riftan as if they BOTH aren’t in the same boat. They had shitty childhoods and had to work their way up to some extent. One just believes that he doesn’t want his partner to get hurt and the other is a child ready to explore the wonders of the world and does MANY things without a care for her surroundings.
The End, thank you very much!

Amen. I read the "he chose to be a mercenary at 13-16" and almost wrote the same speech.

He "chose" to do it so he's not abused? Writing that sentence alone is so tone-deaf. Like you said, he was born a peasant (likely a serf.) The only people who should have seen him as more than dirt on their shoes were his parents: one was never there (he knew he existed though,) the other was only interested in waiting for their own life to begin again (his mom waiting for his father,) and his stepdad, who honestly was more of a standup guy by his actions.

Riftan chose to run away from the trauma of his mother's selfish actions. That's the only choice he made. He became a mercenary because he HAD to. He threw himself at monsters because no one gave a sh*t if he lived or not (until Ruth, and even then, it started off as survival.) His life was so crappy, his only good memories were of Maxi, who he never exchanged any words with.

It's like wanting to execute a dog for biting anyone that comes into their property when that's the job they were trained for. It's the same as wanting to execute victims of guerilla warfare who were kidnapped at a young age and trained to kill instead of giving them a chance at rehabilitation.

Riftan needs that chance at rehab. In this time setting, he isn't going to get that. Maxi is taking charge to get her own. The hope is that by her bettering herself, it can open the door for him to do the same. We have couple therapy and PTSD support for people like this. They don't.

Words of a wise person here