Responses
Also, just to add. Unironically, based on the last panels. If Garam would have stayed, Heejae would've continued to hurt him. Heejae seems to be stuck under the delusion that Garam would always be available to receive him, no matter what pain he causes.
YES TO ALL OF THIS. Thank u Mochi for ur continued insights on NME
Chapters 200-210 was a constant portrayal of Heejae's inability to see perceive himself as anything more beyond a knife—he knows he's wrong. He's guilty. He admits that he does not like seeing a pained expression on Garam's face. Yet, at the end of every thought, as if incessantly, he hammers himself back into a blade and continues his abuse. Thus, even when faced with his lover's pleas, he chooses to drive the knife further, as though convinced that this is the only thing he knows how to do.
Garam believes that Heejae can change, but does Heejae share that belief?
Garam's attempt to set his foot down and be vocal of what he needs from this relationship is evidence of this, but is received by Heejae as nothing more than a threat to the character that he had always believed himself to be—an attack to his foundation. Constantly, he asks, "Why should I change myself?" and silently, Garam lets it go, granting him, yet another chance to change. The irony of the situation is: everyone around him has altered themselves one way or another to accommodate his sharp edges, and he, oblivious to that fact, is the only one who refuses to meet them halfway. We see this change most prominently in Garam, as Sanders has frequently pointed out in previous chapters. What strikes Garam different is that while he has changed—colder, according to Sanders—he is able to preserve his warmth. The change he displays is moreso akin to the ice sheet that covers the surface of a lake in winter, keeping the water underneath fluid.
Garam believes that Heejae can change, but his belief is held only by his affections for the man, and each time the man brandishes his knife, his belief wavers.
The pair's confrontation during the car ride was Garam's final effort—an honest endeavour to see past the man that continues to hurt him, and view only the man that he loves. But when Heejae questions this love, he simultaneously cuts the thread that has been keeping the scars that he caused closed.
Garam leaving was his conclusive and unequivocal decision to stop the cycle of hurt—Garam no longer believes Heejae can change.
Note:
What a way to end the season! Am honestly very nervous as to what's going to happen next chap so I might have to let it marinate for a while seeing as Heejae HAS said in previous chapters that he plans to ruin Garam's career if he leaves. I don’t know what bullshit that guy plans to pull, all I know is that I am NOT excited for it.
As for season 6, if ever there are plans for a reunion between the two, I hope it is only after Heejae really proves himself to have changed for the better and ACTUALLY puts in the effort to make up for all the shit that he's done (I'm actually gonna crash out if this ends up like jinx), otherwise he needs to stay in the past lol. Anyway, I trust BDK will be able to deliver another peak season as they always do.