I think Baekhee knows he's not in love with that manipulative asshole. I think he knows the difference in how he feels when he with Il-Woo vs he who shan't be named. He's acknowledged that he feels weird and at peace when hes with Il-Woo. Fear, low self confidence/esteem, threats and the constant manipulation and degradation both from Voldemort and deadbeat sperm donor paired with no therapy and no clear concrete path to safety and exit plays very heavy roles.
The only "life line" Baekhee has seen has been from Darth Vader. Since they were kids Sauron has been a parasite determined to have a life long parasitism relationship with Baekhee. Imagine how deeply that parasite has buried himself into the mind of its host over the many years. You gotta cut away at the necrosis to hopefully get to fresh healthy flesh. Hopefully Il-Woo continues to sharpen his scaple to get to cutting away at the rotteness (๑•ㅂ•)و✧
The brainwashing and manipulation are too much! Convinced yourself that you are in love with a rapist is all time low. God! I hope he gets some help where he admit that he was being used to the point he can't even think properly. This is frustrating omyghad