I also disagree with your framing. Both are bad and fucked up but for me Richard takes the cake at being all sorts of fucked up.
Ilay believes he owns Tae so he doesn't give a shit abt his opinions and tries to dominate him through force and rapes him but Ilay feels unexplained feeling for him (guilt basically) and tries to go along with Tae's life and likes plus I mean should be obvious but HE DOESN'T TRY TO KILL JAEUI even though he want to. It is his way of love but!
Richard is a literal psychopath that went after his own COUSIN, guiltrips that cousin abt his dead sister, blackmailed him abt his mother, treats him like he's insane, gaslights him of his failure and tries to tame him like a fucking dog by using that cousin's love for the family, threatens him of killing his mother if he doesn't come back, plays with his feelings ALSO that he raped him in their (idk) mausoleum in front of his sister's name, finger him while dining with guests and caught by Chris's mother etc. All sorts of ways to act his desires to that cousin while shaming him???
Bruh they are not equally bad
ilay is actually a psychopath though, that’s the whole point of his character. and richard lowkey has more humanity than ilay, because ilay was born without any.
but that’s not my issue. it’s that whenever i read ilay vs richard takes like yours, it comes across as whitewashing ilay’s crimes against humanity.
so i won’t be yapped at by an iltae only passon fan on this because y’all literally always do this with everything (xinlu, richard, other black flags from diff manhwas) just to make ilay seem better.
so irdgaf!! ilay and richard are absolutely as bad as each other.

I know this is bad but I really like how it goes in the novel later. It's not as bad as Richard x Christopher, man if you guys hate ilay, I 100% guarantee you guys will hate Richard's gut. I wish I never have to read their story but I'm force to bcs the story is connected to ilayxtaeui. I freaking love Christopher and I'm still feel bad for him