Help me find this bl manhwa please! It's about a top that like this bottom since childhood...

Help me find this bl manhwa please! It's about a top that like this bottom since childhood. So this bottom like an ml? In this one novel i think. So the top want to be like him too. So he become nonchalant and even study abroad so he can impress the bottom. And the bottom thought the top become really distant but he didn't realize the top actually love him.