I really dont hope that this will be me. But the reality seems to be closer and closer to ...

I really dont hope that this will be me. But the reality seems to be closer and closer to this. My parents are starting to age, they cant work blue collar jobs anymore, their physique just cant. I am the firstborn, i do have at least another sibling, but i am the only one they can truly rely. I go to uni, i side hustle a bit aside uni, i hope to get an internship, i try to take care of my parents. I try my best to make them proud. I sacrifice my youth by not going out partying, not going out to have fun with friends. I sacrificed my dream as a kid, because my parents said i wouldn’t make enough money with that. Even today i still exist just for their purpose. I know i am a stepping stone for them to live comfortably when they go in pension. I know they just don’t know it better and don’t know how to showparental love properly, i forgive them all the time… but… who will ever give me the chance to properly live. not for the expectations of my parents or anyone but to live for myself? i have lost meaning of my own life… my spark is fading