A little story. I don’t know where to say this. Lol-

This is my biggest fear. Having to share my interests with someone knowing they’ll get weirded out scares me. This happened to me when a girl confessed to be because she thought I was kind and totally her type, but my first thought was “what if she finds out the real me? Will she be disappointed? Do I have to get rid of all my books, deletemy comic/novel apps to be with her? Sacrifice my comfort zone?” But, I started to like her a little bit and I showed a little of my real side to her and told me “you’ve got a cute and innocent face of a girl, but you’re dirty minded, huh?” I was a little embarrassed and that reaction made me laugh. Then, I decided to showmore of my side until we’ve came to decide if we should start the courtship and that’s when I had to admit that- “I’m not who you think I am. I’m not kind and all that. I’m very weird.” I couldn’t tell her straight that I have hypersexuality because I knew she wouldn’t understand. I told her to wait until we graduate where I can be free from my parents and we won’t have to date secretly. Until it was my birthday, she surprised me with cake a letter (it was also our first term examination it was a rollercoaster!!!) We went out to a cafe and explored places with our classmates until I got home. I was smiling and starting to consider sacrificing my coping mechanism to be with her. Then, she texted me; “I don’t have romantic feelings for you anymore. I’m just happy to have you.” It hit me straight back to my fantasy world. I immediately redownloaded my apps, recovered my “private” account, and started drowning in my fantasies. Yeah, it’s a doomed yuri experience. Also, I found out last week that she stopped talking to me, unfollowed me in social medias, and kicked me out of the group chat (gc with me and her friends). All that because she said: “Why would I wait for her? I don’t want to wait for her if we won’t be together in the future anyway.” Tbh, I was more than mad than sad. I was getting ready to be with her, preparing everything to have a peaceful future for the both of us. I was taking her seriously. Update: she’s currently talking to a 9th grader. ☠ pedo.