Minoh has been trying??? A lot??? But Junoh was the one who kept shutting him down? Idk what kind of relationship you have in mind, but being in a relationship where you're the only one who makes the effort to do stuff isn't a healthy one??? And idk why you keep saying that "Minoh should do this and that" when he LITERALLY HAS NO IDEA ABOUT IT because JUNOH DOESN'T TELL HIM ANYTHING. A boyfriend/girlfriend isn't someone who'll fix your troubles for you, it's a mutual relationship based on trust. Junoh is clearly not ready for a relationship if he doesn't trust Minoh enough to tell him anything. You're blaming Minho when all he does was keep trying to get Junoh to open up. MINOH DOESN'T OWE JUNOH ANYTHING. He deserves to get out of a relationship that only makes him feel bad all the time.
Junoh went really far out of his comfort zone, so he is trying in HIS way. Minoh was friendly and outgoing and sociable. Junoh was closed-in, self-protective, insecure, cautious, like some bullied and abused people are. When Minoh noticed him, he was being bullied by Changhyun (sp?), so it's not like he's that far from the place of gloomy victimhood. That's why expecting him to be upfront, vocal, communicative and relationship-savvy is odd.
And it's the communicative one, who was the pursuer and wooer, to take the extra steps of understanding a person who has communication issues. Since Minoh wooed and initiated this relationship, and he knows how Junoh is (and how many misunderstandings have ALREADY occurred), then yes, he should try harder.
You probably want to check chapter 37 to see who initiated their relationship, it was Junoh. Minoh didn't go aggressive on him, he was just happy being with him like a love sick puppy. ╮(￣▽￣)╭
and Minoh did tried reaching out to Junoh, he even told Gitae that he's seeing less of him(cos yea he's busy with Tinky Winky) then after that he goes hanging out with Chang Hyun. If you were Minoh how would you feel when you want to hang out with your boyfriend, who rather hang out with another guy because he wants to ask some questions. But with Minoh he keeps silent about it when he's being asked.
If Minoh was really important to Junoh, he'd avoid having misunderstanding with him. I can let it pass if Minoh was always the first one to reach out but Junoh never opens up.
and they way he reacted that Minoh is still hurt abt what happened - like, for someone who had the bullied-traumatized past shouldn't you know better that being hurt by the one you like doesn't heal overnight - unless he doesn't really value Minoh's feelings, he might've just made a move to Minoh cos he knew he has feelings for him and only that. ╮(￣▽￣)╭
ummm...no...
first off, Minho is just as new to this as Junho is (they're both extremely inexperienced in regards to dating). second, Minho DID try but he did so in a way that respected Junho's wishes, ie, Junho clearly stated that he wanted to work things out on his own and Minho, being a supportive boyfriend, held himself back (keep in mind that Minho is hotheaded- he could've easily beat the shit out of everyone who was harassing Junho but didn't because he respects Junho.) lastly,
"Since Minoh wooed and initiated this relationship, and he knows how Junoh is (and how many misunderstandings have ALREADY occurred), then yes, he should try harder."
no...just no. healthy relationships don't work like that, only problematic ones do. why the fuck should Minho put 150% effort into his relationship while Junho only puts say, 85% effort? that just doesn't make sense.
So know it's all Minoh's fault?
I get Junoh is introverted and has been through a lot of bad experiences but you expecting Minoh to fix everything for him when Junoh
1. Doesn't tell him a thing, even if he was the first to ask and is always worried about him.
2. Prefers getting drunk and crying while sharing his problems with one of the guys that bullied him rather than his boyfriend.
3. Only remembers Minoh exist because he hasn't been contacting him. And in the same moment realized that oh..yes if Minoh didn't put the effort to talk to him they don't talk.
3. Minoh wasn't expecting a relationship with Junoh, yes, he had delusional dreams about it but he was fine with just being friends and helping him. Junoh was the one that kiss him out of nowhere without understanding his own feelings and most importantly without moving out of his feelings for another guy?
I think it's fine Junoh it's trying to resolve his problems, but you can just say that the way he forgets Minoh exist is Minoh's fault? Just because he should have Know? Go read chapter 67 on batoto and you can see Minoh feels bad about ignoring him and feel that he acted wrong. But has Junoh even had more than a though for Minoh in all these chapters.
He is Kore occupied with other guys and hasn't spear their relationship a second of his time.
It's not just about dating. Minho has had good school relationships and good home relationships and he's pretty confident and outgoing. The opposite of Junoh. YOu're assuming this is a couple of two well-functioning people--ie, healthy. No Juno is NOT healthy. He still is calling himself "trash" and "garbage" and feeling insecure and he's having flashbacks to his bullying days, rejections. He's not healthy. To expect him to act healthily, like someone who's never been bullied, has had friends, has been able to socialize well...not fair to Junoh. Some relationships require one person-the healthier one, stronger one--to draw out the strength of the other and be more patient.
My comment about what a healthy relationship ought to look like was not made specifically towards this story; rather I wrote it because of what you said:
"Since Minoh wooed and initiated this relationship, and he knows how Junoh is (and how many misunderstandings have ALREADY occurred), then yes, he should try harder."
Your thought process, in regards to what a healthy relationship ought to be, is in my opinion flawed. Person A should not expect their partner, person B, to put more effort into a relationship simply because B "initiated" said relationship. A relationship consists of two individuals working together in order to maintain a healthy and balanced life together. That's it.
Also, no one is claiming that Junoh must always act rationally. I agree with you in that he is unstable due to past trauma. What's incomprehensible to me at least, is Junoh's willingness to go along with his bully and confess his insecurities to said bully when he has others to talk to? His choice to visit the purple haired dude was totally understandable. I was proud of him because of his character development. However, his current relationship with his bully makes no sense...tbh I love this story and plan on finishing it, but like, it's just bad writing. As mentioned before by many people, this is simply drama for the sake of drama. Junoh's character is now meh... (SHIT BUM ACTS MORE RATIONALLY THAN JUNOH AND HE'S DEFINITELY FUCKED IN THE HEAD)
Seriously, what kind of mentality are you having? You're blaming Minoh for everything bc he's had better lives than Junoh? Jesus, what are you, twelve?
Minoh deserves to be in a healthy relationship just as much as Junoh does. Minoh doesn't deserve to be treated like this by Junoh just bc Junoh "has had a harder lives" than Minoh's. Minoh doesn't HAVE to be treated like shit by Junoh and accepts it bc Junoh has suffered more than him.
A boyfriend is not your psychologist/psychiatrist. Jesus.
It's not blame. It's just the trajectory of establishing a relationship. Minoh deserves a healthy relationship, but if he wants Junoh (and that does seem to be the case), he's gonna have a bit of work to draw Junoh out to that place of communication. If he doesnt' want to be with Junoh's complications, then break up.
No one HAS to be in a relationship, after all. I'm saying that because Minoh is the "healthier" one, he has to be more patient with the "not so healthy" one, and that is not illogical. I dunno why you're getting so bent by that.
And no, I'm not 12. I am someone who has had a VERY healthy relationship for a VERY long time, and things have their times when one has to step up to the plate more than the other for various reasons, including things like illnesses or work stress or whatever. People who love pick up the slack sometimes for the loved one, and vice versa.
People seem to forget that Junoh 1. was viciously bullied by someone he liked/thought a friend 2 was outcast and not-talked to 3. has learned to keep to himself and be quiet, passive from all these experiences.
He even said to Minoh he's trying to handle the "situation" but "it's not going well." That's the point where Minoh should have realized his bf was having a hard time and pressed him for info, kept an eye on him, asked Gi TAe to help, etc.
It's understandable that both of them are jealous--and honestly, these latest set of chapters are damn confusing with the way they flow awkwardly--but Junoh has been traumatized and he's emotionally wounded and he's just not a guy who speaks up easily. Minoh should have seen this by now.
Both of them will need to communicate, and Junoh is dragged by people who have bullied him--which I do get ticked with Minoh for not thinking that the former bully might be doing anohter form of bullying that Junoh can't handle well, but is TRYING.
I sympathize a lot with Junoh. Minoh has not had to go through anything like what Junoh has, and Minoh always had supportive family and solid BestFriend. Junoh was ALONE and abused and lonely. :(
How can I not feel sorry for his struggle?
ramble over/