I just

I want to honestly believe that if Tomoe didn't have those two she'd have stayed and raised Ayu. But when you realize that she could follow her dream and leave her child, that she loved, with people who would give their child stability and love. She felt safe leaving. She wouldn't check in or call if she had abandoned her kid.

I just do not understand how you could possibly leave your child to be raised by somebody else like she missed so missed so many important moments in the life of her kid.

Plenty of mothers never feel the "mother" bond other feel even if they raise the kid themselves. Its much more common then people realize but is so highly looked down upon that people don't talk about it. Everyone is different. Making it so there is only one acceptable way of feeling like a mother and everyone else just doesn't care enough just hurts the ones who just naturally don't feel that way.

How can you not love your child? Why would you give birth to a child if you can't even make it feel loved and appreciated like that's horrible. Every child deserves love.

Her love is different. She left her baby with a GREAT couple. Who love her as their own. What is more important? Taking care of your child while wishing you were following a dream? Or loving your child while she has parents who could give her what she alone couldn't? May be hard to understand but I believe Ayu is better with them.

I mean yES of course they are better parents than the mother! I mean that's why I would only consider them as my parents and not my biological mother who did not raise me ... Even if you have a dream you can certainly either give up on it for the sake of your child bc that's real love or follow your dream but also at least twice a week visit your child....

to me having a child doesn't equate to losing your dream job and tomoe job is quite a noble one as she is a war journalist not only that she has friend that she can trust in raising her only child , she also keep up with her chuid growth and from one of the chapter we can see that the kid do remember that she has a mom and understand that she is working for the sake of children of war.i have a niece who mom work in a different country when she was just around 2 years old and she was pretty mature about , a child comprehension of situation should not be underestimated and as for tomoe i think your use of the word abandoned is a bit presumptuous since we dont know if she is permanently staying outside of japan or nor

I mean we would get a scene where the mother visits them if she did, or not?

But I guess if the child is fine with it it's fine I guess.

Because they don't know how they will feel after the baby is born. They expect to have that motherly feeling and they just don't and the ONLY WAY TO KNOW IS TO HAVE A BABY!
Besides, everyone loves differently. Our brains are complicated and pregnancy messes with your hormones. Again, plenty of women don't feel the motherly bond. Some never do, they just will never connect that way with the child. Even if they wanted the baby in the first place. Some people will grow to love their child but at first almost resent the child. The love the child but they are also sleep deprived and getting use to a new lifestyle, people can be on edge. Its thouse people who often feel like they are trash because they don't think their babies poop is gold like the media tells them they should.

Every person is different. Every family is different. Plenty of people have a parent who they don't see for long periods and they turn out fine. Plenty of people have both parents at home and they are completely messed up because of the parents "caring."

Also, they skipped years between the 2 chapters, the mom could very well of came back. The story is still about the guys and the author easily could have decided that wasn't important to the main story. I personally think that sounds more like bonus pages then main story.

if you read the book throughly, in the chapter when the MCs finds out who the father of the kid was, it shows them realizing something, and they were thinking of tomoe coming to their door step and giving them her baby. they pretty much implied that tomoe gave them her baby because the baby was created with the man she loved, who had died, and didn't want to be reminded of him again with the baby.
http://www.mangago.me/read-manga/kazoku_ni_narouyo/uu/kazoku_ni_narouyo-chapter-4/28/
im not saying she's not a good person, but she isn't a good parent. she wants to help save kids, but she practically leaves her own in the process.

I agree. Just the very fact that Ayumi knows who her mom is, and knows her mom loves her, is enough proof to me that the mom stays in constant contact with her daughter with regular phone calls, letters and photographs, and taking her child when she is back in the country. That is NOT abandonment. If she showed no interest in her daughter, then I would agree it was abandonment. Heck, there are people that are there physically with their kids almost 24/7 but constantly neglect them and ignore them that are better examples of a parent "abandoning" their child than she is.

YES.

I've heard from so many woman who felt like crap because of hearing the attitudes here. "Your child should be your life." "You should be this type of mother." They felt like they were horrible mothers because they didn't have those maternal desires and feelings that people say you must have. But they do love their kids and there's no neglect. It's so irritating and borders on the same You Must Want Children rhetoric. Can we open our eyes and hearts and see not everyone is going to be that 1950s housewife? Ffs.

YES to this too.

I think even if you do not love your child you can't just throw away your responsiblity for your child and give it away cuz you don't feel like raising it right now. She could've thought about whether she is able to raise her child and not do her dream job or not before giving birth to a child.

The newest chapter explains why she did it. . .

I agree 100% there is no excuse for abondoning your child.