It doesn't mean that won't happen in some cases.
Believe it or not, some gays are so good at covering up their acts around the person they like. They can remain as a best friend for so long just to keep close their loved one.
I didn't say it couldn't happen. Nor did I say this was I about his hiding how he felt for 10 years, and accepting being his friend instead. You don't have to be gay to do this or to have this happen to you. A lot of people know or think they they suffer from unrequited love and make do with what they can get. My point was whatever you do suffer from that choice is on you, not the other person who quite naturally took you for a friend to confide in. The lack of logic is then blaming the person for not noticing how you felt when you have been doing your best to hide it.
Finally some sense! Call me insensitive, but I can't really feel bad for a guy who blames his suffering on his unknowing unrequited love. How's someone suppose to know that you like them when you've been doing a great job at hiding it the whole time? Why would it be that person's fault for not noticing? Do people have to be mind readers now?
(This is unrelated but, I know a lot of people in relationships that expect their partners to just know what they want/think/feel, without telling them... and I'm just like, yeah okay that works........). It makes no sense to me haha. Anyway, I guess it's just easier for people to empathise with someone in unrequited love (rather than empathising with the person on the other end of it) because the one in unrequited love is experiencing pain, while the other person is not. Anddd this comment unnecessarily turned out to be much longer than I thought it would for an old topic..
I think a great many people when reading these stories do automatically sympathize and empathize with the person in love, and have a tendency to overlook or dismiss any of his character faults or less than reasonable behavior compared to the other guy. They are after all often reading yaoi for the romantic relationship aspect, so the guy in love will automatically have a "sympathy advantage". But I think if they imagine suddenly having one of their close friends confessing a long standing love for them, that they are just unable to return, how would they feel? Like a villain- hardly. But shocked, hurt, and probably a bit betrayed by that friend, because now their friendship is not likely possible and they cannot be lovers.
I agree with you and OP - but I feel that it's realistic, although it is unfair and illogical! The one who's been secretly in love has been hurt (and hurt themselves) over and over again for years. Even though it's not actually the other person's fault, I think it's psychologically realistic that they'd kind of blame the person who they can't help but feel is the "cause" of their pain. Even blaming the other person for 'never noticing,' because after being so conscious of it themselves, they kind of feel that it must be really obvious.
It's unfair, you're right! But I feel like it's understandable.
It is nice - and refreshing - to sometimes see manga tell the "unrequited love" story from the other side - like http://www.mangago.me/read-manga/soredemo_yasashii_koi_o_suru/ (Yoneda Kou is my goddess anyway) and http://www.mangago.me/read-manga/like_that/
I can agree it to it probably being realistic, since I often find that we're not that really all that logical or that sensible in how we feel or react to situations. Most of the time people don't think much, and certainly hurt and anger can make people say and do things they normally wouldn't while not wanting to think about things too much at the same time. Yet we persist in having this idea and perception about ourselves as a sentient race that generally acts in a rational manner. I'm not so sure. We are all too willing to deceive ourselves or to ignore risks and/or long term consequences for possible short term gains which logically makes no sense yet happens all the time. So it is a rather sad piece of realism, and while realistic and understandable hardly forgivable on those accounts. Unless the character owns up to be unreasonable himself.
I never said anything about it being unrealistic, so yes I agree with you, it is indeed realistic. It's very easy for humans to get blindsided by emotion—a "human condition"—as they say. We are fallible and more often than not, irrational. Yeah I do understand his circumstances, I just don't agree with it, that's all. OP's response is pretty spot on for me too. Anyways, YONEDA KOU is a GODDESS! I wholeheartedly agree, she's one of my faves too! And I also love Asai Kou! Both your examples are already in my faves. Thanks anyway. :)
Umm.. are you me?? Have we humans transcended that far for us to be able to exist in the same plane of the multiverse? Bad jokes and theatrics aside, that was well said. You took the words right out of my mouth, although you've put it much better than I would've. I wasn't going to comment again as I don't really have anything to add, except to agree with what you've said. Affirmation can be nice sometimes I guess.. ? Anddd, I shall take my leave now. haha
I thought this last story a perfect example of the strange logic of we humans so often have. The uke doesn't tell his friend that he loves him for 10 years, lives with the self-inflicted pain, and when he finally confesses, he blames the other guy. Is every guy now going to have suspect their best friend even if they have shown no sign of being gay, because that is what that argument kind of supposes. Oh I forgot, the uke hadn't dated, so that proves it, he must be gay (rather than not having found a girl he liked). In this case true, but really...