Speak up when you feel that you are ready and safe! Dont think its your responsability to do so, at the end of the day your state of mind and safety goes before anything else.
It's great that you've come to this realization. I think you understand what religion is supposed to be. More than the practices and teachings of religion, the end goal really is becoming a better person making a better world for others. Speaking out against your family will be hard, so start off with other people you feel comfortable with, maybe friends who seem to have a more open mind. And whatever prejudice your family has, just make sure it stops with you. Not passing it on is already a big thing
I'm glad you're are growing as a person. I can see you're trying but I can also see some more growth is needed. Being gay is not a choice, I hear a lot of seemingly open-minded Christians say that to defend us but it's actually really harmful to say being gay has anything to do with free will, or a choice, or a lifestyle. It's not a choice.
It's because of people's belief that it's a choice that no one wants to accept our existence in the first place. They think we choose to "sin" when it's not a sin and God literally made us this way. It's not about respecting a choice, it's about understanding it's not a choice and accepting our very existence. Believe me I wouldn't choose to be persecuted for the way I love, no one would. I was born like this.
Anyways sorry for rambling. I can see that you are growing into a good ally but it is important to go deeper than BL (which is honestly pretty problematic, heteronormative and even homophobic at times lol) and try to divorce the idea of queerness being a lifestyle. I hope you can help your family change one day though.
Also would reiterate what person above said. It's great that BL introduced you to this perspective, but don't base everything you know off of BL. While I would say that BL is able to portray some of the real-life problems (harsh judgement by society and/or own families, not having the legal benefits that heteronormative couples enjoy), it also has its problematic portrayals such as limiting characters to seme/uke. This is not how it is in real life, but I think the reason why this prevails is because people try to understand them as a straight couple. They look for who does the guy role and the girl role, which is not the case.
I grew up in a christian family and my first encounter with bl was completely accidental however, it opened my eyes to the fact that other than hetero relationships, there were other kinds of relationships out there and it made me more openminded to accepting those people who are different to the point that I could've been a confidante to a classmate of mine in highschool, which was amazing.
People often use God and the bible as a reason to justify why homosexuality is wrong, but the bible also says not to judge others and that salvation is something personal between eachn person and God and as long as they are clear of their faith in their own hearts then no one has the right to criticize them because its their choice.
God gave everyone the right of 'free will' ans what they choose is their business, no one has the right to criticize them for it; this is what I believe.
However believing it and being able to stand up for it are two completely different things.
It completely eats me out inside when I hear my family talk about gays like they aren't even human but I hate myself more for not being able to speak up against their prejudices.