Same thing that happened to me. When I was younger I was assaulted by a family member and for the longest time ever I made myself think he was just playing and it was ok since he was family and whatnot. Still to this day I try and trick myself into thinking he was just playing around but I know deep down that’s not the case- I just want to forget about it. Then it happened multiple other times with different people and I also tried to justify their actions. I believe the female lead doesn’t want to acknowledge it as well just like me.
So so relatable. This hits home. Same here. I had no idea. Grew up pretty sheltered and knew nothing abt s-x till towards the last yrs of high school. So for me, what he was doing was just playing. I never told anyone, never hated him, or questioned it because for me it was like any other game. A game a bit strange, that i didn’t enjoy much, but my thought was i shouldn’t be selfish and only play the games I liked. And example i remember having in mind was “well, my cousins make me play soccer with them sometimes even though i hate it. I have to be nice sometimes.” Not just him, but there was a her too. She made me do things to her because “some parts itched” and i had to help her feel better. I wasn’t thinking it was bad, but saw it as just a little weird. But weird like for example, when my grandma or a family member will ask me to walk on their back because of some back pain. Weird, but not a bad thing to do.
Same happened with some senior female schoolmates in elementary school. It was either called a chore I had to do when on duty, or one of the punishments they are assigning. I really had no idea. I will think “ok, I’ve done my chore (or received my punishment). I don’t wanna think abt it anymore. I won’t whine abt it. It’s a bit embarrassing, but probably not bad, so i won’t complain or say anything).
Never said a word to anyone.
It kept going for yrs.
After they seniors graduated and i stopped seeing them, and after we moved and i stopped seeing him and her (the 2 extended family members), i was relieved, but that’s it.
It was years after that i finally understood what happened back then. I don’t even remember the names of those seniors at school, because i didn’t even think abt what happened as being a bad thing. I was thinking when it was happening “it’s weird and definitely not something i like, but punishments or chores are supposed to be disliked and hated. And games are not always what i want or enjoy doing.”
I feel so bad for the younger me.
That’s manly why i became a social worker working with kids. And let me tell you, i have had so many similar cases. The worst ones are when the abusers are the direct parents and when the kids end up defending them or giving excuses.
;—; i’m shocked that other ppl have gone thru the same as me. i was assaulted by a family member too n i’m still scarred of it. i never knew what was going on n why he was doing those stuff to me. i was so little. like how a baby don’t know about a hot stove can burn you n hurt u. u learn thru experiences you had on other pain. like eating hot soup. babies aren’t born with knowledge what sex is. it’s only as we grow up n have puberty. she must’ve been shelter n didn’t have those kind of thoughts.
This is why we have to teach kids what everything is .. we can’t simple it down or else they could get confused. Everyone wants and should protect their kids but should never say it was the victims fault or say things they could’ve done better in order to protect themselves. Adults should teach people how to do better so they don’t do this to others and traumatize them because to them it might be a game and some silly thing that they could care less about but they don’t know the effects it has on the people they caused pain to. The trauma that was caused could lead the person to have ptsd or other mental illnesses. Literally I’ve become so numb to others and just have vengeance on my mind as well as wanting to cause the equal amount of pain but Ik that’s wrong.
We’re not born immediately knowing what actions are and the issues with them or how to protect ourselves. We learn them along the way which sucks because it’s either through firsthand experience or learning about others experiences and even then you don’t think it’ll happen to you until it does. I never thought so many people went through this as well and it shocks me and hurts me because no one should go through this. We need to teach others better to prevent this because It hurts knowing ppl close to you and thousands of others went through this.
i see a lot of people here saying the female lead is too dumb to notice and her apathetic attitude to being sexually assaulted but the things is, there are situations that doesn't feel like harassment. i was sexually assaulted when i was young too but i didn't know back then, years after just then i realized that i was molested. There are really people that just didn't know, until someone had to tell them. Statistics can tell you that majority of sexual assault victims don't acknowledge they were molested and/or raped right away, if ever— it's the body's response to trauma. And seeing y'all comments about it, and knowing the perpetrator complicates matters. It's the reason most people don't report their assault, y'all just love to victim blame here. And it's why those victims didn’t know they were assaulted in the first place. Your narratives can make someone even more unsure of what they experienced.