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Idk if y’all forgot...

mashiiro January 24, 2021 7:30 pm

Idk if y’all forgot but mental health doesn’t exist in this “time period”. A woman’s sole responsibility is to get married and produce an heir and raise them. Y’all actin like they know wtf post pregnancy depression is or depression AT ALL. Stop hating on the husband of doin what he was raised to do. He went to war cause the king ordered it, not cause he wanted to. And he comes back to his relative trying take over his fief and to his father dead. His wife also hates their kid, and now he’s dealing with the royals scandals left and right that deal with his wife’s family. He did suggest his wife take time off for herself, hence the vacation to the south.

Some of y’all defending the wife to hell and back too but real talk if your mom hated you and blamed you ruining her life you’d feel some type of way too. Even if you knew she got depression after pregnancy you wouldn’t be able to forgive them like nothing happened. Stop acting like depression or trauma is an excuse to act a certain way, it don’t work like that. Her feelings and depression are VALID but her actions towards her kid is NOT. I’m all for her getting a redemption and a second chance but is it because she feels guilty and wants to make herself feel better after treating her son like shit or is it cause she genuinely cares for her kid? There’s a big difference.

Responses
    Natsu January 24, 2021 8:25 pm

    Yea i agree! The husband is also suffering along with the wife. So to solely blame the husband for not knowing what wrong with his wife is ridiculous. The wife doesn’t know she have anxiety and depression. Truthfully no one deserves to be blame. Yes the mother made a horrible mistake luckily she wasn’t beating her child or doing anything like that (i hope) but neglecting him isn’t any better even though I understand depression really do take over someone to the point where they want to commit sucide or avoid, hurt and neglect the people they love. They don’t mean to do it and they want to be able to love but it’s gets really hard when you have depression especially severe depression.

    But i do disgree with the example you used. Truthfully I wouldn’t hate my mother if she had depression and was neglecting me because of it. I would forgive her it would of course be hard to forget what she did but i would forgive her because i know she didn’t mean to neglect me and that she really do love me but she have a hard time showing it. I can’t blame her for something she can’t control especially if she didn’t know she had it.

    The husband and wife was both young when they had a kid and gotten married even though I truthfully do not agree with what the husband said at the end of chapter 15 but it had to come out since that actually made the wife talk about how she was feeling.

    grillcheez January 24, 2021 9:46 pm

    fr tho i feel like all the people hating on the husband were also the ones who judged ercella before her story was told. like don't judge him solely because of ercella's pov yfeel like there's more to it than what's shown.

    hxhism January 24, 2021 10:31 pm

    i feel like you’re one of those people who act like signs of mental illness aren’t smth to be taken seriously. depression isn’t as easy/simple as just getting sad and choosing one day to just neglect your child. imo, she did try loving her child in the beginning and in the end, she was so confused why she couldn’t despite her efforts. depression is complex and it literally alters a person’s brain and makes them act a certain way which in this case was her neglecting her child. her saying that her baby “doesn’t look like her baby” should’ve clued you in on that fact.

    if none of those tragic events happened in her life, i’m sure she would’ve had the capacity to love her child, but she was fighting a lonely battle and her husband not even taking the time to comfort her certainly didn’t help.

    and to be honest, for me she does truly regret what she did as a mother. even in the first chapter while she was dying, the one last thing she wanted to say before she died was that she loved vicente.

    nana January 24, 2021 10:41 pm

    finally, someone has said it. I should thank an ml like this that didn't force her to do something. I am touched, foe the fl she's trying to escape the situation without facing it, she had depression, yes but I can't forget what the maid said on ct 2: just because you have a baby mean that you had to give up your golden flowered life, it makes me think that at that moment she was also selfish to the son because of her golden flowered life?

    Natsu January 24, 2021 10:42 pm
    i feel like you’re one of those people who act like signs of mental illness aren’t smth to be taken seriously. depression isn’t as easy/simple as just getting sad and choosing one day to just neglect your... hxhism

    I understand what you’re saying but it’s not solely the husband fault. The husband also have things going on especially when he had to go to war at 16-19. They were both young and with a child. That probably affected him and he also have to constantly work. He didn’t know what was going on with his wife but he also didn’t take the time to find out. Truthfully i just feel like no one should put all the blame and hate on the husband when he is always going through thing or been through things just like her. I don’t blame neither the husband or the wife but i do wished the husband was a bit more caring and actually took the time to pay attention to his wife.

    nana January 24, 2021 11:10 pm
    Yea i agree! The husband is also suffering along with the wife. So to solely blame the husband for not knowing what wrong with his wife is ridiculous. The wife doesn’t know she have anxiety and depression. Tr... Natsu

    I read the cp 15 but I agree with the husband because he didn't know that the wife was reincarnated and in a bleak of time after 15 yaas she started interesting in the son I will act the same way because I will feel suspicions about this changing of behavior, she didn't even know anything of the son he was a stranger for her.

    grillcheez January 24, 2021 11:17 pm
    i feel like you’re one of those people who act like signs of mental illness aren’t smth to be taken seriously. depression isn’t as easy/simple as just getting sad and choosing one day to just neglect your... hxhism

    i don't think the op was disregarding her mental illness but just pointing out the fact that it wasn't considered a major issue the way it is today. males in that time period didn't carry the social stigma of having to take care of the emotional needs of their family, especially when their marriage wasn't based on love. and as for truly regretting her decisions, we won't know until it's fully explained. many people feel guilty for a number of reasons as their life ends and could regret their actions. obviously, since this is a shoujo, it's hard to come to the conclusion that she's doing this out of guilt, but who knows what the author is going to pull on us ╮( ̄▽ ̄)╭ all i'm saying is that there is a lot left to be explained so who's to say what will happen :-)

    nana January 24, 2021 11:19 pm
    I understand what you’re saying but it’s not solely the husband fault. The husband also have things going on especially when he had to go to war at 16-19. They were both young and with a child. That probabl... Natsu

    the husband is not perfect he can't divide himself into 2 I remember in this last chapter what she says when he is trying to find what she is going true she didn't replay at the end she accused him of everything when is not his fault. everything is on his shoulder when the father died

    mashiiro January 24, 2021 11:29 pm
    i feel like you’re one of those people who act like signs of mental illness aren’t smth to be taken seriously. depression isn’t as easy/simple as just getting sad and choosing one day to just neglect your... hxhism

    Mental health something I take extremely serious and I have lost people in my life to it so I don’t think you have the right to determine whether or not I take it seriously based on a comment I made about a webtoon with made up characters.

    Never in my previous comment did I say depression was something easy or simple. I also didn’t invalidate her feelings, I simply put that in this setting they don’t even understand that depression is a thing, no one knows wtf is wrong with her, especially her. And even if her depression and her feelings are VALID they’re not an EXCUSE for treating her kid like he doesn’t exist or hating her kid. Things like that happen and unfortunately that is common and she can have a reason for doing that (her depression) but it is not excused. She doesn’t deserve to feel that way and her he son also doesn’t deserve to grow up with his mother hating him and him thinking he ruined her life.

    mashiiro January 24, 2021 11:40 pm
    Yea i agree! The husband is also suffering along with the wife. So to solely blame the husband for not knowing what wrong with his wife is ridiculous. The wife doesn’t know she have anxiety and depression. Tr... Natsu

    Yeah that’s so fair, my example wasn’t the best. I just used it cause I’ve seen it in real life how that affects a child growing up and how it changes them. Everyone is different when it comes to their own parents, so your reaction is totally valid.

    Natsu January 24, 2021 11:53 pm
    the husband is not perfect he can't divide himself into 2 I remember in this last chapter what she says when he is trying to find what she is going true she didn't replay at the end she accused him of everythin... nana

    I are you agreeing with what i said or disagreeing?

    Natsu January 24, 2021 11:55 pm
    Yeah that’s so fair, my example wasn’t the best. I just used it cause I’ve seen it in real life how that affects a child growing up and how it changes them. Everyone is different when it comes to their ow... mashiiro

    Yes I understand! Every person is different and not everyone would do what i said or what you said they have their own responses if their mother or father neglected them.

    Natsu January 25, 2021 12:05 am
    I read the cp 15 but I agree with the husband because he didn't know that the wife was reincarnated and in a bleak of time after 15 yaas she started interesting in the son I will act the same way because I will... nana

    Yeah but he could have worded it differently. At the end of the day she is still his mother and she does have every right to be involved in his life even if she was or wasn’t their for him for the first 15 year of his life. She is trying to make up for it and it’s gonna take a lot of time for her to fully gain her son trust back but I’m glad she reincarnated and chose to right her wrongs not just reincarnated and continue making the same mistakes. I’m not blaming the husband since he have every right to be suspicious but truthfully there are thing you can and can’t say to someone who is already depressed and regretting everything. (Of course it’s not like he knew she was depressed though.)

    nana January 25, 2021 12:10 am
    I are you agreeing with what i said or disagreeing? Natsu

    I agree

    nana January 25, 2021 12:19 am
    Yeah but he could have worded it differently. At the end of the day she is still his mother and she does have every right to be involved in his life even if she was or wasn’t their for him for the first 15 ye... Natsu

    He's attacking the fl , and I hope they will resolve and start a new life

    Natsu January 25, 2021 12:45 am
    He's attacking the fl , and I hope they will resolve and start a new life nana

    Agreed

    hxhism January 25, 2021 1:29 am
    I understand what you’re saying but it’s not solely the husband fault. The husband also have things going on especially when he had to go to war at 16-19. They were both young and with a child. That probabl... Natsu

    ig i’m more mad that there are people who are strict with the mother, but not the father. in this case, both of them neglected their child. it’s not like the father was all loving and caring towards vicente either. remember, he didn’t even care abt vicente’s opinion when he tried marrying him off already at a young age. so many ppl like OP here are quick to defend the father and sympathize with him and tell others to stop hating him, but are also quick to brush aside the mother’s feelings abt the situation, having lost her family members and giving birth at a young age. it just seems wrong no matter which way you look at it.

    hxhism January 25, 2021 1:39 am
    Mental health something I take extremely serious and I have lost people in my life to it so I don’t think you have the right to determine whether or not I take it seriously based on a comment I made about a w... mashiiro

    i mean yeah sure, if you sympathizing with the father and only defending him while putting pressure on the mother counts as you “not invalidating her feelings”. if we’re going by your logic, then the husband doesn’t deserve to be excused too for neglecting his child and not comforting his wife after everything he went through. yet you’re out here defending only him and telling others to stop hating on him? it’s not like the husband was all loving and caring towards vicente either. i’m pretty sure vicente was raised by his maids. he didn’t hate him, but there were no scenes to suggest that they were close to each other either.

    Natsu January 25, 2021 1:42 am
    ig i’m more mad that there are people who are strict with the mother, but not the father. in this case, both of them neglected their child. it’s not like the father was all loving and caring towards vicente... hxhism

    Literally no one in the comments that I’ve seen is strict on the mother. Everyone is literally shitting and hating on the father. So far i haven’t seen any comments talking bad about the mother. At the end of the day no one should talk bad about the mother or the father. The mother have depression and the father was raised to be the way he is. Of course he didn’t go as far as to neglect his son like the mother did but he also wasn’t loving towards his son either. Also you need to remember that this is told in a different time period. It’s normal in this time period for people to marry their kids off at a young age. Hell vicente parents is the prime example of that. They had a political marriage. The father is doing what most fathers in this time period do they educate and raise their son to be the next successor so it’s normal in that time period for father to act that way.

    hxhism January 25, 2021 1:44 am
    Literally no one in the comments that I’ve seen is strict on the mother. Everyone is literally shitting and hating on the father. So far i haven’t seen any comments talking bad about the mother. At the end ... Natsu

    literally “no one”? you ok? there are some people who say they feel bad for the father rather than the mother, saying that she still shouldn’t have neglected her child and you’re literally saying that?