Not so much as me inflicting but that I receive it. Such as getting abused, tortured, raped and killed. I imagine all those scenarios getting inflicted on me (though in a male form) and it just makes me question my sanity because I don't really like pain but I think up the most sickest way to feel those pain. reply
I would be the insecure, possessive uke that feign being happy and confident. I would also be a bit violent and controlling but still a loving uke who would overthink on whether my lover would love me or am I just a toy. Very gloomy as a uke.
For being a seme, I think I would the same as being the uke however I would hide all those dark thoughts o...... reply
I can't remember but I think around 8 or 9? Not sure but I know it was before 13 because I actually converted a friend into a fujioshi at the age of 12. I discovered the World of Yaoi through YouTube. It was quite the view since the yaoi I used to watch was those psychological rapey(?) kind. It sort of made me realize how dark and maybe(?) sadistic...... reply