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My friend has been actively pursuing guys this last year, he is better looking tall, white and has a decent job.

I'm also gay but have been forced to live with family due to foolish mistakes on my part in education. It's my fault and I brought it upon myself. I'm going back to school for a degree that can actually get me a job and I'm happy to have a goal to work towards.

But when he showed off his boyfriend...I was really surprised at how I felt. I felt not joy for him. But this dark pit of jealousy. I didn't feel hate for him or anything but...I had successfully buried the sadness that I got from being rejected by men (especially white men) away and his announcement just made the wound bleed again.

Why can't I be happy for him?
2017-09-21 08:42 marked

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