Blackkat's Favorite

In order to understand why I am comparing both main leads, I have to say that this analysis is based on my theory about Yoon’s suffering from the past. See for more explanations with this analysis.
http://www.mangago.me/home/mangatopic/5596560/

Our protagonist is the eldest son of an influential noble family who was dragged by the topknot by his own father before cutting it off. This must have traumatized our seme, since in the first season he grabbed two nobles, Jihwa and another sex partner, by the topknot and threw them in the courtyard. Because of the father’s gesture, Seungho’s reputation was ruined as he was declared a sodomite in front of the servants. As results, the gossip started. Out of resent and hatred, Seungho decided not only to turn this rumor into a reality but also decided to become the biggest sodomite ever. So living in debauchery in order to hurt his father the most… ensure that the latter wouldn’t be able to make a comeback so soon or to help his younger brother as his own father had betrayed him.

This led to the following situation. This unwilling homosexual had problems with his sexuality hence he needed replenishing medicine and help from the ukes in order to get aroused… until he saw Baek Na-Kyum’s paintings. Notice that in the paintings, we see one lover trying to look to his partner. The gaze is rather vivid compared to the drawing Jihwa had. Furthermore, BNK’s paintings about sodomy ooze warmth and love. They all look so natural, there is no shame or pain connected to sodomy. That’s why I came to realize that what Seungho affects the most is what he sees. This explains why the author drew many pictures of Seungho’s gaze.

Therefore in my opinion, the problem Seungho had was the gaze he received from people. As you know, the eyes are considered as a sort of mirror, people can see themselves in the eyes of the other party. From my point of view, although Seungho doesn’t care about the rumors, he saw himself judged, he saw their repulsion but more importantly he saw himself as disgusting and repulsive. He took their judgement as face value. He believed that their eyes did give a true reflection of himself: repulsive.

You are wondering now why I came to this idea that Seungho couldn’t bear the gaze from others but on the other hand, showed no concern to rumors and gossip. It is because first, the rumor of his homosexuality was created by gossip and he knew that the gossip never reflected the reality. Secondly gossip and rumors are linked to the ear and not to the eyes. There is no reflection at all.

There is a scene which reveals the importance of the eye and gaze in Seungho’s mind. This happens in the pavilion, where he has sex with Jihwa. He came to visit his sex partner, although he already had sex with him the night before. The reason for his visit was the first painting that Baek Na Kyum had created had aroused him immensely.
http://www.mangago.me/home/photo/5833993/
http://www.mangago.me/home/photo/5833999/
episode 3
Notice that although Seungho is having sex with Jihwa, he doesn’t look at him. His eyes are not directed towards his partner but they are focused on his mind, on the painting he discovered that morning. It was as if he was blind… he only sees the picture of Baek Na Kyum. The reason for this strong reaction is that he observed his own gaze caught by the painter.



The lord’s gaze not only was directed to the painter, but it also showed desire and attraction. There is nothing ugly and disgusting in this gaze. That’s why he is so obsessed with the picture, when he has sex with Jihwa. This scene outlines that Seungho cares a lot about what he sees. He saw in the painting a different reflection of himself. This explains why after this first painting, Seungho is often starring at Baek Na-Kyum while having sex with others. Seungho keeps looking into the painter’s eyes. He is fascinated by the gaze he is receiving from Baek Na Kyum who is unaware that his eyes are betraying him. That’s why there is this quote: “The eyes are the mirror of the soul”.

http://www.mangago.me/home/photo/5834031/
here episode 14
In other words, through the first painting, Seungho saw a different reflection of himself and realized his own attraction. This freed him from the disgust he felt for himself. He could finally accept himself and even his “forced homosexuality”. But since he realized that the painter had painted him in such a positive way, he couldn’t help himself looking at the painter. He became interested in him, even attracted to him, since the latter revealed a certain desire.

However, there is one scene where Baek Na-Kyum show a certain repulsion in front of Seungho… it is the moment when Seungho tries to make a move on the painter.
episode 2
Striking is that he is even using his own gaze in order to seduce the painter. But at the same time, he also warns the painter if he disobeys him, he will be punished.
However, since the painter has been brainwashed by Jung In-Hun, the former shows disgust for one minute which upsets the lord. Simultaneously, Baek na Kyum’s reaction is also triggered by the subtle thread. His facial expression shows disgust as fear too.

The other reason why I am outlining the importance of the gaze and eyes is because of Sartres’ philosophy, a French writer and philosopher from the 20th century. In one of his theaterplays called “No exit”, one of the characters there says:

“hell is other people” (“L’enfer, c’est les autres”) by Jean Paul Sartres

Being surrounded by people, you will always be confronted by their eyes and their stare will reflect their own perception of the other. You will see yourself in the other’s eyes and this reflection will let you believe that this is your own reflection and your true personality.
However, eyes never reflect the reality as there is a lot of subjectivity. And our seme Seungho had been definitely living a hell due to the disgusted gaze from others. Notice that Jihwa is portrayed with closed eyes in the painting (see the third picture above), just like the other ukes… this explicates why Seungho could never see his own attraction and even the love Jihwa had for him. Jihwa tried to hide his own feelings, scared that he would frighten Seungho. Nevertheless what Seungho needed was to see himself as someone lovable, as someone attractive but Jihwa never let him see this.

Finally, the significance of the gaze is also pointed out with another scene and element: the mirror. After the rape, Baek Na Kyum tried to run away but he was stopped by his mentor, Jung In Hun, who forced him to go back to the mansion. After his return, Seungho dragged the painter to his chamber where they spent the whole day and night together. Here, Seungho even puts the painter in front of a mirror because he wants him to see his own reflection: he is affected by Seungho. He wants to acknowledge his own desire and his suppressed sexuality.
http://www.mangago.me/home/photo/5834014/

episode 32
The painting and the gaze of Baek Na Kyum liberated the lord from his own trauma and suffering but at the same time, it inflicted a new pain: the painter was never looking at him, as his heart and mind were occupied by the hypocrite Jung In Hun which leads me to the second part: a portrait of Baek Na Kuym. With the mirror, Seungho was confronting the painter with his own reflection, simultaneously the lord wanted him to see that Seungho was his partner and not the “learned sir”. It also showed his desire for the painter.

Now that we have portrayed our seme, it is time to pay attention to our painter Baek Na-Kyum. The arc of the first season represents the loss of innocence of our uke.

Striking is that the latter’s life represents the opposite of Seungho. While the latter belongs to the influential nobility, Baek Na Kyum is an abandoned infant who was raised by the head gisaeng. His unknown origins and the fact that he was raised in a brothel reveal his low social status. But their social status is not actually the biggest contrast. Now, you are wondering what this means. Let us not forget that people kept wondering why NK painted sodomy so early and they all thought that he had seen this in the gisaeng house. However, I believe that in reality BNK chose sodomy because he recognized his own sexuality very early. He felt that he was attracted to men and thought that there was nothing disgusting at all.


Notice that the young man is painting outside and anyone can see his drawing. This underlines his lack of shame. For him, homosexuality was natural. And this picture shows his innocence as well. Although he was raised in a brothel, he remains pure. This shows that he initially accepted his own sexuality but he knew that he couldn’t live with his homosexuality so openly, because as an adult, he realized the complication. Hence he published his books under a pseudonym. Nevertheless, he connected homosexuality to love but not sex, although he had been raised in a place where there is only sex and not love. Baek Na Kyum wanted to be able to read and write on his own. He values education a lot which is also palpable in the poem from Jung In Hun he kept. At some point he met the teacher Jung In Hun who became a surrogate father to him. He literally worshiped the poor lord and always thought that the teacher was intelligent because of Jung In Hun’s tendency to paint himself as superior. Notwithstanding the teacher Jung In Hun must have discovered his books. From that moment, the teacher tried to oppress Baek Na-Kyum’s homosexuality. He started brainwashing him saying that this was something disgusting and repulsive. The gaze from In Hun must have played a huge part in it, especially because he was attracted to the teacher due to his education and good manners. The repulsive gaze from In Hun and his harsh words had a huge impact on the painter. Let us not forget that Baek Na Kyum called Seungho a person consumed by lust (episode 4) and later we hear the same expression in the mouth of the double-faced Jung In Hun. The teacher forced him to stop painting. He could no longer paint sodomy as he had been manipulated to believe that homosexuality is vulgar and bizarre. It is an abnormality where he could no longer link homosexuality with warmth and loving stare.

As you can see, the painter’s homosexuality was oppressed, while Seungho was forced to homosexuality. However, the gaze Seungho gave to BNK had the same effect. In this gaze, he could feel the admiration from the lord
http://www.mangago.me/home/photo/5291837/

episode 1: Seungho reveals his admiration for the painter
Seungho is actually smiling and starring warmly at BNk, until the painter denies that he is the author of the painting. However, the first painting BNK drew in the lord’s house reflects the attraction and the lust from Seungho (see the third picture above). There is no negative judgement coming from the lord… and as much as BNK’s gaze through the painting liberated Seungho from his own hell, Seungho’s gaze had the same effect on BNK, his true sexuality was coming on the surface. This is illustrated, when Baek Na Kyum paints the first picture for Seungho. While he is painting with the brush, he reminisces the sex scene and keeps thinking about the gaze Seungho gave him.
http://www.mangago.me/home/photo/5834006/

episode 2: this gaze reveals attraction, desire and lust.
The gaze triggered the sleeping sexuality in Baek Na-Kyum. That’s why BNK had a wet dream with Seungho in the episode 6. The explanation is quite simple. The more he saw Seungho in his sexual activities, the more Seungho kept looking at the painter, the more Baek Na Kyum was affected. He could no longer oppress his sexual desires. We shouldn’t forget that although he thinks, he is in love with Jung In Hun, he dreamed about having sex with the lord and not the teacher. He has the impression that Seungho is touching him… BNK tried the whole time to fight against his own desire because he had been brainwashed by In Hun. As conclusion, the gaze played a huge part for the two main characters. It liberated them, the painter’s sexuality came alive, whereas Seungho freed himself from the judging gazes.

And now, at the end of the chapter 40, In Hun reveals his true thoughts about the painter. He is just a prostitute. Yet there is a huge difference between Seungho and the painter. While Seungho has never cared for gossip and rumor hence he felt no embarrassment, BNK has always paid attention to people’s opinion and judgement. As you can observe, Baek Na Kyum is sensitive to the ear. Striking is that we often witness the noble whispering to the painter’s ear, like in the following drawing. Or at the tailor shop… Baek Na Kyum seems to pay more attention to the ear than to the eye. That’s the reason why he is sensitive to gossip, unlike the lord. So not only he is affected by the gaze from others (see the shop owner’s gaze) but also he is definitely affected about what he hears. He believes that rumors are reflecting reality that’s why in the beginning, BNK remembered the rumors circulating about Seungho. Our uke is not so mentally strong like our seme and in my opinion, Seungho needs to realize this. He needs to understand that Na-Kyum is different from him in that matter. He has been brainwashed by the teacher, the fatherly figure. But just like Yoon Seungho, he makes the same experience: he is betrayed and abandoned by his “father”. They share a similar experience, yet Baek Na Kyum’s betrayal is new compared to the one Seungho lived. Notwithstanding, I believe that this could bring them closer.

Moreover, there is another reason why Yoon Seungho’s heart was moved and touched by Baek Na-Kyum: his tears. In the first episode, he cries after the lord tried to make him feel guilty about the death of the servant. In this scene, the noble even lowers himself to the painter and wipes away the tears. He is surprised by his emotional reaction. And the tears play a huge part why the noble will become more and more emotional. As conclusion, the eyes and tears are the most important elements which change both personalities.

From my point of view, Seungho needs to remind Na-Kyum that he is definitely a talented painter… he needs to say what he mentioned in the beginning:

“These are the talented hands”.

BNK needs to hear something positive about himself. Moreover, Seungho needs to change BNK’s reputation. The latter is always described as low-born but what Jihwa and the others forget is that BNK is a talented painter in the first place.
BNK has to find his true identity, his true self… If he is not called a low-born, then people call him with different names:
– “my boy” like in the picture from the episode 1 (see above)

– a “servant” which BNK denies
– a “ill-bred cur” or
– Even Seungho described him as “In Hun’s bride”, when he was upset
– “a prostitute”
As you can see, people forget that he is a painter… all of them (except Seungho) look down on him. Just like a teenager who detached himself from his father, Baek Na Kyum needs to find his true self, his true identity so that he is no longer defined by his status.

When we look how the relationship between Seungho and Baek Na Kyum evolved, we can clearly see that the lord had awaken his oppressed sexuality. He approached little by little the painter, however he never thought that Baek Na KYum was so innocent, since he had been raised in a gisaeng house and painted such erotic paintings. He never thought that this boy was so pure and innocent, although the sudden love confession reflected his innocence. As much as the first experience was not so painful, the discovery that he had mistaken Seungho for his teacher pained him a lot. Because of this, he was later raped and even forced to do a blow job. Baek Na KYum had such a bad experience with sex that this was a rude awakening. On the one hand, he had been freed from his oppressed homosexuality, on the other hand he discovered the violence of sex as well. He could not see any love and warmth in it, although he had been the one who gave love and warmth during the first night spent with Seungho. While the latter was craving for this again, Baek Na Kyum was somehow disgusted as the lord had taken advantage. Due to the rape, BNK can no longer see love in Seungho’s gesture, even when the one claims that he will take responsibility for this. It will take a long time for the painter to discern the true nature of Yoon’s gestures and words.

That’s why it becomes even more urgent for Seungho to intervene and support BNK as a painter. He has definitely connections to the royal academy. Just changing the clothes is not enough and Seungho will realize that.
In other words, Seungho needs to help BNK in many ways… not just a job as painter but also to give him an education, something BNK has always been longing. Actually, BNK fell in love with In Hun because the latter acted as an educated man on the surface. He saw in him the father he was missing. He had a oedipal relationship with him, until the latter abandoned him as he reminded him where he came from: a giseang house. He had never been his adoptive son… just a low-born, a prostitute. By supporting Baek Na Kyum in his education and career, Seungho can get the love he has been longing for. Baek Na Kyum will realize the love Seungho has for him. I suppose, the attempted murder and Seungho’s protection could be the trigger for the painter to perceive the lord in a different light.

Fell free to comment.