kshush

note: forgive my rant because i'm not really the most articulate person ever so maybe y'all won't get it HAHAHAHAH

i'm halfway through the story and there's just something about this that makes me feel icky especially with the ml's actions. i know that these characters are flawed af and that's the point of the story but i just really dislike how the fl was villainised by the ml. what he went through at the hands of the fl's father was horrible but he was also very unfair to the fl. i hate how he redirected resentment that should be for the fl's father towards the fl. the father he just killed but the fl, he literally did emotional torture towards like wtf?

also, bro was literally having a whole parasocial relationship with her. i disliked the way he created this ideal version of her in his head and made up his own assumptions of what she's like and then ended up resenting her after knowing that she was not who he thought she was. and i was like of course she's not??? you've never even talked to her???? you don't know her??? this was very unfair for the fl because even at the start of their relationship, she was already (unknowingly) fighting against something she can't win against- this idealized version of her created by the ml. he literally viewed her akin to a saint. and that's a burden that's too heavy to put on anyone, especially on someone you actually haven't met and talked to and just looked at from afar. that behavior just gave me major sasaeng behavior. he was giving delusional. and don't y'all think it was creepy that he was just there hiding out in the bushes watching her as she was practicing playing the piano??? what are you? a fucking peeping tom? he's weird and creepy and controlling. the whole time he was just having this whole pity party and can't understand why the fl would be sad, that she shouldn't have the right to be sad. like dawg, her entire family was killed? in front of her??? because of you?? fuck you. sorry for the overreaction but i literally can't just stand characters that make it their whole personality to hurt others just because they are hurting too. this is basically ml the whole time: "hey, so your dad is a horrible person and i'm gonna kill him and your entire family but you shouldn't feel bad because they are horrible and deserve to die. now i don't know what to do with this overflowing resentment i have so i'm just gonna treat you so bad that you would want to kill yourself but i don't want you to kill yourself or die even if living is so painful for you because i might love you and it will really hurt me if you died. thanks" do you know how insane that sounds????? and yes, he had some really sad backstory and that's why he is the way he is but like idk i just can't seem to like him as a character despite it all.

so like is this story even worth finishing if i just can't stand the ml? hahahaha does it get better?

this story was going so well until this happened. putangina mo talaga dojin sarap mo sakalin mga 100 times wtf di lang man na guilty "she looked like you" putangina yan lang excuse mo for betraying your partner behind their back for years??!!?? also not byul already knowing how the grandma treated hyesung and still chose to be in contact with her wtfff. nangibabaw pa talaga ang landi. not that i dislike landi pero this is such a serious issue and seeing how it played out is just so fucking disappointing. tapos si black haired guy forgot his name, what in god's name were u thinking?!!! kissing someone in distress without their consent???!! get me tf out of here. this chapter made me so madddd. made me remember how bad abo/omegaverse manhwas just brush off serious issues and just use it as plot device for the main characters' "connection" to "blossom" tangina. matug nalang ko oi giatay HAHAHAHA