Thought you guys might want to know so you can judge for yourself if you wish to continue the story or drop it.
I needed to get this out of my system so badly because I was so fucking frustrated with the story. I want to hug my girl Iyeon and also SHAKE HER HARD FOR NOT MAKING HIM SUFFER/GROVEL HARDER.
Despicable things Chaewoo did to Iyeon once he recovered his memories:
⬤ Sexually assaulted her several times:
➤ Made her throat bleed from a rough blowjob. Iyeon volunteered to give him a bj but he was so rough and uncaring about her wellbeing and feelings. He fucked her throat so hard he made her throat bleed. He wounded her throat. That's SA. He fucked her mouth beyond her comfort level and physical limits until her throat bled.
⋙Novel excerpt: “Her throat tingled as she fought the urge to vomit. She slowly poked her tongue around the inside of her ravaged mouth, trying to ignore the metallic smell of blood.”
➤ She didn't want to have sex and wanted to sleep. She keeps saying go to sleep. But he sticks his fingers inside her vagina anyway even when she's not wet! She's dry!
⋙Novel excerpt: “The inner wall, which is not even wet yet, swallows its finger well to the end of the root, but she pushes him away.”
⬤ Demeaned her and treated her carelessly like she was an object: Iyeon didnt want to have sex and wanted to have a shower first because she was sweaty. He took her to the bathroom and sprayed her with strong water pressure like she was a dog until she was sputtering.
⋙Novel excerpt:
"Despite her protests, Chaewoo put Leeyoen down, turned on the shower and began spraying her with water..."
"The water pressure was strong and left a painful tingling sensation all over her body."
"She closed her eyes and mouth tightly and held out her arms as if trying to hold back the water..."
"ChaeWoo mercilessly kept the stream pointed toward her."
⬤ Caused an explosion that made Iyeon hit her head on some rocks and lose consciousness. He deliberately knew that Iyeon would get hurt from the explosion but didn't bother to take her somewhere safe. He left her and just allowed her to get caught in the explosion. He was literally in the same space as she was when it happened. He had time to take her somewhere safe but didn't do it. He wanted her to get hurt.
⋙Novel excerpt: “”Chae-woo!” Lee-yeon called, but there was no use. He turned away from her. Then, boom! She covered her head at the unexpected explosion... Lee-yeon looked back at the place where Kwon Chae-woo had been. He was gone. The last thing she remembered was being pushed forward by the waves. Thanks to the growing pain she felt from the moment she opened her eyes, she was certain she’d definitely hit her chin on some rocks as she fell. She had no idea how she’d made it out alive.”
⬤ Destroyed the orchestra ensemble in the forest that she prepared for him which was also her entry for the Hwaidome 4th trial. He intentionally ruined her chances at the competition. After she got so far in the competition :( He knew how hard she worked for it. He was literally by her side throughout her journey :( and yet he did not spare her a second thought before destroying her hard work.
⬤ In the same scene, he strangles her just like how he strangled her in Ch1.
⋙Novel excerpt: “The hand that was suddenly gripping her neck tightened. Her voice burst out desperately. Lee-yeon grabbed his wrist tightly, her face turning blue as she struggled to breathe.”
⬤ Poisoned and killed the sacred 500 year old spirit tree that Iyeon was taking care of. HE KNEW JUST HOW IMPORTANT THAT TREE IS TO IYEON AND HE INTENTIONALLY KILLED IT TO HURT HER. That tree was entrusted to Iyeon by the villagers. So when the villagers found it dead, they were angry at Iyeon and called her a quack and attacked her!
⬤ Allowed her to be physically beaten and verbally abused by the angry villagers. Watched her get assaulted by a mob with a pleased look on his face as the angry villagers physically and verbally attacked Iyeon for the tree he killed.
⋙Novel excerpt: "His indifferent gaze seemed somehow pleased. Despite having her hair pulled, her neck scratched, and even falling to the ground from the rough touches of the people, he just watched idly.
⬤ Destroyed her garden and trashed her home. After the villagers assaulted her, she went home and discovered that Chaewoo had his men trash her home and garden.
⋙Novel excerpt: “After Kwon Chae-woo left and she returned home with a messed up body and mind, the front yard was completely overturned as if a wild animal had gone through it. The living room was dirty with footprints, and broken flower pots and vases were scattered around the house. She didn’t see it but men came to her house while she was gone and destroyed everything they could see.”
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
And those are just the highlights! Throughout the arc he was verbally, mentally, and physically hurting her.
All throughout this arc I was mourning Amnesiac Chaewoo so hard i kept thinking "Amnesiac Chaewoo would never do this to her!". Bc Amnesiac Chaewoo may be pushy but he always considered her feelings and emotions :( he was affectionate and caring!
This Evil Chaewoo never considered her at all during this entire arc. Even Iyeon mentions it when she starts to notice him changing. Novel excerpt: "You used to react very sensitively to my feelings!”
I know he is a black flag but for me the things he did were too cruel. Despite the redemption arc, I don't think it was enough to forgive him. He is downright unredeemable to me.
I seriously don't think they should've gotten back together. Also Iyeon was not mean and harsh enough to him during his groveling arc. I wanted her to treat him like trash that he is! And he was still forceful and stubborn and kept invading her personal space when he was asking for her forgiveness. He was so pushy to have Iyeon forgive him when he doesn't deserve it at all.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
A FEW “GROVELING” ARC SPOILERS (will not spoil everything in this arc bc a ton of stuff happens! And i cant remember everything exactly bc theres so much! BUT it all happens in JUST 1 month during her contract at the Kwon estate. And yes, she forgives him during this 1 month. After all the shit he put her through, she allows him back in her life after just 1 month of "groveling"...)
⬤ Only seriously apologized when he found out she was pregnant
(Ofc the FL doesnt forgive him on the spot. And he spends more time trying to get back to her good graces. But still? You only doubled down on apologizing to her after discovering shes pregnant?)
⋙I find it a bit distasteful that when he found out she was pregnant that's when he broke down and started begging for forgiveness. It felt disingenuous to me bc it felt like he only wanted her back seriously bc she was useful again (yknow carrying his child/heir and everything). Hurts alot bc when they broke up he told her she was useless to him. He had a realization that Iyeon was ready to move on with her life with their child without him, and he didnt want that.
⋙He can't stand that she was ignoring him and treating him indifferently (as she should after you were so cruel to her!) Classic trash male behavior that they start losing their mind when you stop giving them attention.
⬤ Prior to finding out she was pregnant, his amnesiac personality's memories and feelings merged with his killer personality which made him very confused with his feelings. He has a brief moment of reflection over his terrible actions but he still doesn't say sorry to her out of pride (that bastard!) when he had the chance to speak to her at the Kwon estate. They have a forced proximity shit thing bc Iyeon was brought to ML's home bc of his evil brother. She's there on contract to fix the gardens. When ML sees her in person that's when his conflicting feelings and memories start haunting him.
⬤ ML starts bothering FL and following her around. FL is determined to ignore him and the ML (that fucking bastard i want to kill him) doesn't like that she is ignoring him and appears to not be thinking about him anymore.
⋙Novel excerpt: "Right here, right now, I'm going to discard all the memories associated with you."
⋙ChaeWoo says this to her before he left her to the angry villagers,
⋙So why the fuck should she give him any attention at all?
⬤ But the real turning point IMO was when he found out she was pregnant. She got sick while working there and the attending doctor found out. That's the first time we saw him begging her for forgiveness. He had many opportunities to apologize to her before he discovered her pregnancy, but he didnt because of his pride.
It makes me think if she weren't pregnant would he even bother to beg for her forgiveness?
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
I really hope the artist takes artistic liberties and that they would not adapt every crime that Chaewoo commits against the FL in this manhwa. Bc the groveling/redemption arc in the novel was just not enough to make up for the severity of Chaewoo's crimes against Iyeon!
I don't see how the redemption arc can be satisfying and earned if they don't modify or omit some of the cruelty Chaewoo inflicted on Iyeon. Since I don't think they will improve his groveling/redemption arc, the only way it can be satisfying at all is if they lessen the severity of his crimes, either by omitting some of them or modifying them to be less severe.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
Addtl rant:
Mygod I still cant move on from when HE ALLOWED HER TO GET ASSAULTED BY AN ANGRY MOB OF PEOPLE FOR A CRIME HE DID.
It hurts so much to see bc I get reminded of Amnesiac Chaewoo who instantly defends Iyeon and offers to kill people for her just because they were talking shit about her!
And now we have this Evil Chaewoo that just watches idly as she gets physically and verbally beaten! for something that he fucking did!
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
IMO, the best punishment for Chaewoo is to be denied access to Iyeon. Chaewoo wants nothing more than to be allowed back in her life and stay by her side.
What made it so unsatisfying for me is that Iyeon allowed him back in her life after just 1 month of staying at the Kwons for her contract. During the 1 month of her stay, Chaewoo does the groveling etc. IIRC, their breakup happened just less than 3 mons ago before she went to the Kwon estate for her 1 month gig.
You guys be the judge. After all the unspeakably cruel things he did to her I dont think he deserves to get access to her again so quickly and be allowed back in her life in Hwaido after just 1 month of "groveling".
What im saying is that he deserved to suffer more and for longer. I WANT HIM TO SUFFER FOR YEARS . I guess Im just being vindictive now. But I just cant forgive him for making her bleed during sex, sabotaging an important milestone in her career, and literally watching her as she gets beaten up right infront of him! THE ANGRY MOB LITERALLY COULDVE KILLED HER!
If he really loved her how could he bear to just stand by and watch as an angry mob attacked and beat her up? They were pulling her hair and scratching her skin and shoving her to the ground AND HE JUST WATCHED WITH A PLEASED LOOK IN HIS EYES.
Fuck. Just typing that out again just reminds me again how there's just no way to redeem that. How could you even redeem that cruelty? Even the author doesnt know how lol.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
I'm gonna read this manhwa again just for Amnesiac Chaewoo's chapters. The artist really made him too handsome...
I’ll prolly revisit when I'm not as emotionally hurt anymore from the ML's cruelty because I really love the art style.
But honestly, if this manhwa didn't have a beautiful art style I never would've bothered to read the novel or keep up with the manhwa at all. My heart just cannot forgive the ML's cruelty.
I love male yanderes when I can see their affection and care for the FL despite their violence. BUT THERE WAS ZERO CARE AND AFFECTION FOR IYEON DURING ENTIRETY OF THE MEMORIES RETURN ARC. It's just back to back abuse from the ML :(
Amnesiac Chaewoo was the best version because he was violent BUT NEVER TO IYEON. He was violent to people who hurt her! and was always 100% ready to protect her! He would never intentionally hurt her or cause her harm :(
If you've reached until this end, thank you for listening to me! All novel excerpts are from the translations by lunarletters!
#GrievingForAmnesiacChaeWoo
Hello everyone !! in honor of Eighteen's Bed S2 coming soon, I am here to spoil the rest of the story! I also did so back when when S1 ended so if you find this similar it was probably me hehe (●'◡'●)ﾉ
Just a reminder to everyone it's been since November since I read the novel, so recalling the novel exactly is a bit hard and I might miss some details.
Please feel free to ask questions and I will try my best to answer them !!⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
Starting from where chapter 43 leaves off. Juns arm was actually fractured from their altercation. Which leads up to Jun needing a cast for the next few months (which I believe was three). When Jun returns to school, as he opens the door to enter, coincidentally, Yohan is actually leaving as well. It is obvious to Jun that something has changed, as he puts it "There was a strange malice in his eyes. It reached into some deep-rooted fear inside me. My mouth went dry. Yohan brushed past, shoulder bumping against mine. The gesture carried a dear sense of displeasure. That was when I realized— I was discarded. " From then on, other students start picking up on it and from them on there are many incidents of harrasment towards Jun. Also from that day on, Yohan moves seats and stops eating lunch with and Jun, Jun also from that day on usually stays seated and dallys away his day with studying.
I don't know if it's the same day or another day, but in any case, one day there are nasty names, insults and such left written on Juns desk. Jun doesn't care much but it gets to him a bit. He leaves to grab some rubbing alcohol and napkins to clean his desk off, but upon his return to his desk, he finds that someone else had already done it for him. He is later introduced as a half Korean half American student named Shin Jaehyun. From then, Jun kinda takes an interest in him. From the looks of it, he was set up to be the second male lead, or at least thats what I got from it. From Juns later evaluation of him, Shin Jaehyun is a nice, smart guy but a coward. A person who is only nice because he doesn't trouble in his school life. Not saying he is actually a mean/bad person, just that hes nice and polite to everyone so that he doesn't get into trouble.
There are also small incidents of small things being thrown at Jun, or incidents of his desk being messed with. The students who hang around Jun are Lee Seokhyun, Kim Minho, and Oh Yeonjun, they’re not exactly buddies, but not exactly enemies. If anything, They are only acquaintances at best who happen to hang out.
A few days later, Go Yohan also starts to worsen things. There are times he says things to drag Jun in the mud and humiliate him. Like saying "Kang Jun, stopping ruining the class vibe, will you? I'm trying to study and you're fucking my mood." In that moment, it wasnt even Jun speaking, it was the other guys hanging around him. One thing as well, Yohan stops calling Jun "Jun" and starts refering to him in his full name, Kang Jun.
That same day at lunch, Shin Jaehyun actually approaches Jun, and gives him an egg sandwich as he noticed all Jun was eating for lunch was bread. Every time Jaehyun is mentioned, I'm pretty sure they always mention how American he is. (His nickname is "Yankee" lmaoo). That very same day as well, Jun's shoes get stolen, or rather people threw his outdoor shoes away. As he walks home in his slippers, he realizes that there are shards of glass in his slippers. He later gets stitches for that. It's insinuated that people had put glass in his slippers.
The next day in P.E. they are playing soccer which Jun has to sit out of because of his injuries. As Jun sits at the bleachers, the ball gets kicked straight at him in the face. Jun is absolutely stunned. He tries one more time, he gives Yohan once more chance to set things right between them. He straight up BEGS Yohan to say something and stop his harrassment saying, “Go Yohan, Please...,” but Yohan being stuck up and prideful, says nothing and the bullying gets a bit worse. Jun starts to straight up resent Go Yohan from there. When Jun goes to the infirmary, he runs into Ha Taesan. He immediately recognizes that Jun is getting picked on. I'm not sure, but I think either he tries to help Jun, or stays quiet about it. Either way, they talk but I don't quite remeber what their conversation is about. Ha Taesan eventually gets up to leave, but right before that, he tells Jun that stuff in the scrapyard gets incinerated each Friday.
The day after during Lunch, to my suprise, Go Yohan sits next Kang Jun and starts being really annoying. He begins asking Jun where he's eating, what's he been up to, to which Jun responds along the lines of, "yeah sorry I've been studying and plus im hurt", to which these are obviously lies. Amused with Juns response, Yohan responds mockingly, “you never said that?" The whole situation is embarrassing (even I had the hardest time getting through this scene). Anywho, Yohan gives Jun an egg sandwich. Seemingly jealous from Shin Jaehyun from the other day. Jun says he doesn't want it and keeps rejecting it. In result, Yohan slaps him. (This had me absolutely FUMING) Jun says that it was "a slap between a joke and something serious, enough for it to hurt." Aka the slap was a warning to Jun while making it seem like it was just two friends playing around so that no one gets into trouble.
The next day at lunch, Yohan buys him bread, saying that it looks like Jun seems to like it. This seems pretty mockingly to me. Up to this point, Jun had only been eating bread from the canteen to avoid Yohan in the cafeteria and he couldn’t really manage eating a whole meal at school, which is why Yohan says what he says. Jun refuses, but Yohan keeps insisting. Yohan ends up giving up, and instead of being a mature highschool student, he instead ends up being petty and starts smearing the bread (which has chocolate filling) all over Juns workbook. Jun isn't really in the mood to put up with his bullshit or putting too much energy towards anything related to Yohan, so all he does is throw his workbook away. Jun tries to leave the classroom for some peace and quiet but Yohan yanks him back inside the classroom. Yohan then starts going on about "why are you ignoring me," and "when I speak to you, you answer," and blah blah blah. Instead of entertaining Yohan, Jun just reponds to him saying,“This is over, isn't it? i thought we'd go back to being strangers." To cut it short, he's just telling Yohan that he’ll live in solidarity and asks him to leave him alone. Yohan, having a short temper, throws a chair to the floor. Yohan starts spewing bullshit like, “you’re doing this on purpose right? You actually want to be close again but your pride won’t let you." Jun fires back, “you were the one that said this was over, why are you clinging like you’re regretting it?" At that, Yohan freezes. Jun takes it as a sign to escape and leaves the classroo. Right after leaving, Jun runs into Jaehyun in the hallway. In an attempt to comfort Jun, he takes him to the art room. (Jaehyun is the president of the art club). He tries to comfort Jun again and gives him yogurt. Sensing something from Jaehyun, Jun tells him, “don’t cross the line.” (To be honest, I don't really remember what he meant by this). Jaehyun then talks about his time in America and opens up about his bullying. In an attempt to make Jun laugh, he even makes a racist joke that was told to him in his time in america. After this, Jaehyun tells Jun that he's welcome to go inside the art room whenever he wants to and gives him the key. Jun eventually gives the key back, not really wanting to involve himself too much with Jaehyun.
The next day, Jun stuffs snacks into his bag for lunch so that he doesn't need to be given food from anyone. He leaves a bit early as because of his injuries and he takes a taxi. As he is leaving, it turns out (the psycho) Yohan was waiting for him outside. Yohan tells him “let’s talk”. He drags Jun into the alley between their houses. As Yohan starts about his making up bullshit, Jun is entirely focused on the arm on his shoulder. which seems to be slight PTSD from chapter 42. He tells Yohan, “okay but can we talk without you touching me?” Yohan at that scoffs and says “you think I’m still into you? I only want to make up because my father likes you.” Jun then responds by saying, “I don’t want to. Can’t we just act like we don’t know each other and go our separate ways? You can tell your dad we made up i don’t care.” Juns taxi arrives, so he attempts to leave, but Yohan drags him back and starts saying “Who are you gonna cling to now?” and goes on Tbh this seems like Yohan was jealous and only wants Jun to cling onto him.. He gets interrupted by Juns taxi driver and Juns makes a quick escape.
Later that same day, Jun goes to the scrapyard to look for his shoes. As he is there, he runs into Hong Huijun. One of Junwoo’s ex-lackies and seemingly new leader of that little friend group. They start saying a lot of bullshit in an attempt to provoke Jun and eventually things get physical. Not because Jun responded to their provocation, but because Jun wasn't really falling for their bullshit. Jun, who is extremely fed up with his school life, actually fights back. He actually beats the shit Huijuns ass. He uses the advice Yohan had told him in earlier chapters to win. It is later revealed that he had broken the guys nose. Jun then proceeds to knock out after beating Huijun up.
Jun wakes up, and he finds himself in the hospital. It is then revealed to him that his parents had flown back from their business trip in the U.S. and his mom raised hell about school violence and even got Huijun expelled. As he looks around, he finds Yohan sleeping on couch in his hospital room. Eventually, the two start talking. Yohan starts with his “let’s make up” bull crap, and Jun, fed up and exhausted, just gives into so that he has a smooth rest of the year. Yohan is actually really happy about this.
When Jun returns, things go back to semi normal. But there are times where Yohan will ignore, not defend, etc. Jun when he acts the way he doesn’t want him too. When Jun does, as a reward, he protects and defends him like before. Yohan has mood swings pretty much. Jun still very much hates Yohan, his resentment for him growing day by day. but he just toughs it out, as he plans to drop him after Highschool.
Jun goes to the hospital for a check up and gets his cast removed. Jun decides to skip as to avoid seeing and interacting with Yohan. Jun walks around and eventually bumps into Kim Minho. Kim Minho and Jun talk. Eventually Kim Minho tells him, “Hey, let’s take down Go Yohan and end his little regin, I have a plan.” June, is not really interested, but plays along. he asks him what his plan is and Minho tells him, “Confess to Go Yohan, I’ll record it and spread the video around, and I'll also beat him up” Forgot to mention, but in some point in time Jun and Jaehyun meet up in the art room. I believe it might be right after Yohans tantrum. In this specific meeting, Shin Jaehyun tells Jun that there are rumors that Go Yohan is gay or has feelings for Jun. Jun isn’t really surprised, he’s more surprised about how obvious it is to others and wonder how many people have it figured out. This is why Kim Minho tells Jun to confess to Yohan. Jun tells Minho he’ll go along with his plan, but asks him if he can do it after summer break. Minho doesn't really like that, but tells him sure.
During summer break, Jun and his mother go to Go Yohan’s house as his mother offered to give Jun and his mom advice for college. Jun goes to the restroom and runs into Yohans sister, Go Rosah. It is then that Rosah reveals everything. That Yohan is a absolute fucking liar. He lied about everything, about his family being homophobic and being the familys outcast. That contrary, Yohan seems like the favorite. Even tells him the reason why their father likes Jun is because they can dump Yohan on him. Jun is completely stunned and runs out their home.
Break ends and Minho is telling Jun that it is time and he can't wait anymore. And so Jun asks Yohan to meet him in the Music room later. It's later and Jun waits for Yohan in the music room. Minho hides behind a curtain and is recording everything. Yohan actually believes that Jun is about to confess his feelings because it is noted that his ears are red. At this point, Jun is tired of everything and everyone. And so instead of confessing, he tells Yohan that this is all a set up. That Minho was the one to tell him to bring Yohan there to humilate him into believing Jun was going to confess and tells him where he is hiding. Yohan opens the curtain up and starts beating the shit out of Minho. Jun is kind of weak to violence and tells Go Yohan to stop as he doesn’t want to get caught up in a school violence incident again. Go Yohans and instructs Jun to leave and makes a phone call to Lee Seokhyun. And Leave Jun did.
After that. Jun just lives mundanely. He spends most of his time studying and such for the entrance exam. He starts making plans to ensure he doesn’t see Go Yohan again. Instead of applying to Business in Korea University like he told to everyone, he applied to the department of political science. He doesn’t plan to tell Go Yohan. And of course he gets accepted and he’s extremely happy to the point he cries in the bathroom stall. This was a highkey heartwarming moment because you can really feel his relief through the screen.
Once enterance exams are over, Jun decides to go around the city. By coincidence, Jaehyun and Kang Jun run into each other. Just before this, Jun had told Yohan he was going to be at home. They talk and Jaehyun mentions rumors that had been going around. Jun questions how ‘those rumors’ (the ones of go Yohan being gay) were able to calm down. Jaehyun taken aback, asks him, “You don’t know?” Jaehyun then reveals that a photo went around. (This is were I went crazy, I swear my jaw dropped. Go Yohan is a sick bastard, he’s insane). Jaehyun says it was a picture of Kim Minho and Lee Seokhyun KISSING IN THE MUSIC ROOM. (That’s why he called Lee Seokhyun. When I tell you I was sick to my stomach.) He says it was obvious to everyone that it was forced because they both were crying in the photo and how bloody Kim Minho was. Then, a little later, Jaehyun and Jun go out to a cafe. Thats when Yohan spots them. Jaehyun is scared of Yohan (as he should be), and he goes pale as fuck. Yohan starts acting buddy buddy with Jaehyun and questioning how they met (aka he’s mad Jun lied). He’s obviously tormenting Jaehyun because he’s mad and jealous. Jun gets fed up and dumps his coffee on Yohan and yells to him “we’re not friends so leave me tf alone!” Jun grabs Jaehyun and makes a run for it, but Jaehyun, like the coward he is, goes back to apologize to Yohan and Jun is just like “whatever." Jun then makes a little evalutation about Jaehyun. He comes to the conclusion that he only likes Jaehyun as a friend. He tried to make Jaehyun his little crush to get over Yohan, obviously it didn't really work.
After that, Jun doesn’t go to school for the rest of the year (there's only 2 weeks until graduation at this point). Yohan constantly texts and calls him, and Jun striaght up blocks him. One late night, Yohan gets drunk and ends up right infront of Juns door. He rings the doorbell and Jun tells him to leave or he’ll call the police. Jun meets Yohan outside and Yohan starts on his bullshit again, saying that everyone at home hates him. Jun is tired of his bullshit and tells him that he is loved and him he knows he’s lying about not being loved and everything else.
The day of graduation comes and he debates on going, but he ends up going. During the ceremony he bumps into Yohan and Jun fucking BOOKS IT. He runs and locks himself into a classroom where he collects himself. Yohan gets in somehow and he hugs Juns legs and starts SOBBING. he the repeatdly start muttering “thank you, thank you thank you.” In a moment of feeling pity for Yohan, Jun kisses him. I’m pretty sure it was a quick peck. The scene is really memorable because Jun says, “Surprisingly, my first kiss didn’t taste like lemon or lime; it tasted salty and wet.” Jun leaves for home, and I’m guessing he didn’t go through the whole ceremony because it’s mentioned later he didn’t pick up his diploma. When he returns home, he packs up immediately and heads for he U.S., where his parents are, and leaves his phone behind.
After winter break ends, he comes back from the U.S. and heads to his dorm. He applied for a dorm while he was there and even bought a new phone. Once he arrives to dorm, he notes that the other side of it is empty, so he hopes maybe he doesn’t have a roommate. Later after all his lectures end and he’s in his room debating whether he should get dinner, he heads out and when he opens his door, he finds GO YOHAN outside the door. As it turns out, Yohan is his roommate. Last time Jaehyun and Jun hung out, Jun said he’ll never see Yohan again. Jaehyun basically ays“never say never”. Jun thinks Yohan has pulled some bull shit but it really was entirely coincidence. Yohan, is extremely confused but elated. He actually never thought he’d see Jun again. Jun rushes to his room and locks the door. Apparently the doors have some keypads because Yohan is able to unlock it and he says “They tell you to change the password once you settle in.” Yohan tells Jun that he really won’t do or pull anything off this time.Jun notes that Yohan is more docile and more obedient, exactly like a dog. They talk and Jun realizes Yohan doesn’t have this rosary. Yohan tells Jun he doesn’t believe in God anymore and he’s just a bastard because he never granted his prayers when it came to Jun.
Later, I don’t exactly know how it happens bc when i read this chapter it randomly cut to this part, but Jun runs into Minho. Minho starts lashing out on him because of what happened to his plan. He tells Jun to he drinks out of the soju bottle he brought and then he’ll forgive him. Jun refuses, he knows there is something wrong with it. Well turns out he was right because Minho gets pissed and tries to spill the 'water' on him. and apparently Yohan was nearby because he jumps right in-between Minho and Jun. Turns out the 'water' was fucking ACID and it burns Yohans right shoulder (if yall remember the extra and how yohan has a scar on his shoulder wink wink).
In the hospital, Jun is in Yohans room. Yohans parents show up, signing off on surgeries and skin grafts. Eventually, it’s just Yohans father and Jun in the room. They have a conversation, and Jun asks him, “Do you love your son?”, he responds “Of course I do. I rank him second.” (don't know why he mentioned that but ok). Jun (doesn’t say it but he thinks it) calls it bullshit and comments on how messed up Yohans father is.
Later, Jun goes to Go Yohans house to collect some of Yohans things, like clothes and games for entertainment, and he runs into Rosah again. She reveals to him that after the day Jun blocked him, Yohan went absolutely insane. He started bugging others about Jun, even bugging the teachers. He was completely desperate. He went to church, prayed and eventually threw a tantrum and loudly exclaimed “fuck u” to God and went as far as ripping his rosary apart in church. Jun is just like “wtf” and Rosah points out that his face it red. Rosah teases him, not even playfully, straight up confused on how that could get Jun blushing. To shut her up, Juns her “why did u lie to me? Ur father said Yohans second, not his favorite” And go Rosah was completely confused, responding “huh? He told me I was… second..” that’s when Jun learns, yeah Yohans father is fucked up and a liar, and promptly leaves.
Some days later in the hospital, Jun and Yohan talk. It’s chapter 20, the last chapter of the novel, and it’s called “Go Yohans Religion”. Go Yohan just says “I’m atheist now, you’re more useful than the guy up in the sky.” Essentially, Yohan is saying that he’ll belive in Jun, and that Jun is his new religion. Jun doesn’t believe him, so Yohan responds by saying “I’ll show you.” Go Yohan kneels to the ground, grabs Juns foot, and slowly starts kissing his feet and goes up from there. And that’s where it ends. It’s assumed they made out because in the side stories as Go Yohan asks Jun if “they could do what they did in the hospital” and they made out soon after
And bam!!!
I haven’t read all the side stories yet sadly. Life has got me busy. In the side stories, it’s just a small continuation of their life. Jun and Yohan aren’t exactly together or friends, or at least from where i left off. They dont have sex right away. They first actually just rub their dicks together, and later Yohan fucks Jun in between his thighs. Not until a few chapters later, they actually do have sex. That’s where Jun, in a delirious state from the pleasure, ends up confessing to Yohan and telling him that’s he’s actually liked him since high school. It's revealed that Jun has to redo his whole first year, or just one semester as he spent it mostly taking care of Yohan as he was in the hospital which lead to him falling behind. I also saw that in the side stories that there is a omegaverse AU. To which I've heard it isn't really that good,
If you get anything from the story, Yohan is just a complete sociopath, with a messed up home life. You can tell the children of the Go house value their father’s opinion, which was why he was really angry when Jun pulled that stunt in the dining room. Go Rosah mentions that Yohan really treasured his rosary as it was a gift from their father, when he ripped it apart she was completely stunned. The children seek nothing but validation of their father. Yohan says he likes Jun because the two are similar, and he never elaborates further.
Some other things to mention: Its never revealed why exactly Yohan likes Jun, or at least I never picked up on it. He does only say its because "the two of them are similar" which I don't really know what he means by that. I think it might be referring to both of them being gay, but idk?? He never actually elaborates further, or at least from where I left off he never did.
Why he lied to Jun: It's never explain, or again at least to where im at. From my evalutaion of him, I’m pretty sure it’s because he wanted Jun to feel bad and stay with him. A way to trap Jun in a way. And it works, Jun feels pity for him. When Go Rosah reveals the truth about Yohan never actually being the family’s out cast, Jun points out how Yohan prepared food himself and how he did his own laundry but Go Rosah counter’s back saying those are basic life skills, why shouldn’t he know how to do that? Because Jun and Yohan are rich, of course they have maids that could do that, so Jun never questions not knowing how to do simple things. Yohan used these skills to victimize himself and get Jun to feel bad and have Jun stay with him.
One more thing. Go Yohan is known to be a pathological lair. When Jun was in the hospital after his fight and Yohan was there to make up, They end up talking. The topic about college comes up and Jun tells Yohan he’s heard he was going abroad. Yohan tells him he isn’t and that he’ll for sure get into Korea University because of his diverse bloodline. He starts saying that his grandparents are Roman from his dads side and how his one of his grandparents from his moms side is from The U.S or U.K (I don’t remember). Jun is surprised which causes Go Yohan to admit that he made that up and says that it’s true that he was born in the U.S. Going back to when Yohan suddenly sat next to Jun and was questioning where and what he was eating and what he’s been up too. When Jun lies about having told Yohan that he’d be busy studying, Yohan grins and tells him that clumsy lies aren’t good lies and that he should be more confident because it’ll make it more believable. He tells Jun that he knows best because he good at telling lies.
And that’s it! Hope you guys enjoyed hehe. If you're interterested in reading the novel, here are some links:
Novelbin - https://novelbin.com/b/eighteens-bed/chapter-105
This starts from where chapter 43 starts. Please note novelbin sometimes has missing chapters.
Novelupdates - https://www.novelupdates.com/series/eighteens-bed/?pg=1#myTable
Please start from chapter 10.5. Also, if you want to use novelupdates, you need to set up an account. Don't worry, it isn't too hard to set one up.
Enjoy! ╮(￣▽￣)╭