Ok I have no one to talk to about this irl so im going to let all my thoughts out here
So from my understanding, current Allen is parts:
i) og soldier Allen, met nea on the verge of death and agreed to be host in exchange for a wish (unknown)
ii) Nea (memories that make up nea)
iii) Part of previous Lavi’s soul (silver hair*)
iv) our Allen (at least his memories from when he was spit out of helix of life and being sold to the circus to 17 years later)
*Allens hair became white due to previous lavi’s intervention in order to protect Allen. (Ch.255)
Apocryphos goal: wants to feed Allen to the heart because of his immense “helix of life energy”. In order to hasten the resurrection of the heart (i am unsure what he wants to do with it)
The way I see it (for the sake of my mental sanity) its not that the Allen we know is completely disappearing or being wiped out, but rather regaining his true identity, in addition to the memories of the past 17/18 years with the order and all.
Allen’s always had a messed up sense of identity- when he was a child (Red) he was upset about not having any memories before being sold to the circus and not even remembering his own name. After mana 'died', he completely adopted Mana’s personality and mannerisms and now has trouble knowing who he himself really is, which is why he so easily believed (but was unsettled) that he’s been remade by Apocryphos. Because deep down he’s always known that something was off.
And from what we’ve seen of ‘og’ Allen, he seems pretty similar to the Allen we know, so it’s not like he’s becoming a different person entirely. At least I hope. That is if Nea does not fully take over. Maybe even if Nea takes over, Allen will still be there after Nea fulfills his goal. Or maybe im just being delusional bc I refuse to believe that the Allen we know is gone T-T
Side note, I am also curious about what og Allen’s wish was, if it was already fulfilled before Allen was remade or it is currently being fulfilled, or hasn’t been yet. I also really wanna see another Kanda/Allen reunion before anything crazy happens but I doubt that will happen considering their last goodbye ╥﹏╥ Anyways, it is crazy how everything is coming together in the last few chapters and I really hope we get to see this story to its end, even though I will be very sad (⌒▽⌒)
I wonder whats up with suin's wristband and that scene where the bastard yanked it off. also did no one notice how jae u might be getting some memories from the future (past?) where he found suin dead from the car accident??? reminds me of hyunjae from sctir (⊙…⊙ )
I just realised, I think the suin's wristband is hiding SH scars
its not as bad as people say, i thought it was really cute and had a relatively satisfying ending. the first 20ish chapters were hilarious.
asdion pisses me tf off
i am so curious about who little black is looking at hanging (?) in chapter 87. Is it possible that it could be Shan Yue's guardian that signed him off to be sold to the silver foxes? someone had to have been taking care of him since he was a baby when he was first brought to exile. there is no way for him to survive on his own. this might be a reach, but in the 0th chapter at the very beginning, the guy in a cloak hands over baby shan yue to a lady in a skirt and boots, and the person hanging is also wearing a skirt and boots (⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ )
also so sad the evil ring is going on hiatus for like 6 months i need to wipe it out of my memory┗( T﹏T )┛