Insomnia Thoughts

If time stopped completely, would you notice? Noticing requires a change in your thoughts, but if time has stopped, how could any thought change?

I swear it's on the days i am exhausted and have being doing so much exercise that i end up not being able to fall asleep. Like everything hurts and i just need peace, but my brain can't turn off. I'm stuck in a loop of my worst hits: every embarrassing thing that's ever happened, my regrets, and my anxiety about future events. It's like my body is finally still, but my brain is still running a marathon. I take melatonin too...

But since I'm here ranting, this entire week I've been faced with ultimatums that are also keeping awake. There's so many things i want to go to or do, but unfortunately if i do one thing, i can't do the other. And options are something I'm not that interested in, but i have a higher chance of getting into and will have better career benefits, or something that i'd much rather be doing, but have lower odds of getting in. It's like when you choose colleges and you can only Early Decision to one place, so do you pick the school that you're only kinda into, but you know will boost your chances and it's still a pretty good school (oh, and everyone expects you to go there anyways), or place your bets on an ivy you've been dreaming of but likely won't get into? I'm really starting to hate making life decisions

I wrote this like 3 times just to get the pov right chile anyways