A fujoshi’s last will and testament

Hello. I am writing to you from my phone. My mother has taken my computer and is looking through my browser history as we speak. Soon she will find this site and it will be the end of me. So I am writing this to serve as what will likely be my last statement and my will and testament. Please cede the following possessions to respective parties-
1. My brain - Yui Hirasawa
2. My body - Daisuke kambe
3. My heart - Lloyd Folger
4. My male ahego folders - luobli
5. My reputation as the disappointment child - My sister
6. My money - I don’t have any oof but flatten my entire penny collection into one big mega-penny, as was my dream.
Give everything else to unicef. Thank you very much, and wish me well.