Sucking your own penis even tho your straight is gay?

Is sucking your own penis as a straight male makes you gay? i get you want to know what it feels like to get a blow job but technically your also doing a blow job, but its gay, or sometimes not, take a scenario where youre all alone and ur super horny and you wanted to know what it felt like to get a blowjob so you sucked your own penis, but your sucking a penis rn so your doing a blowjob and that makes you gay cs why would you want to suck a cock? but you want to know what it feels like to get a blowjob but you sucked a penis so youre gay, but you only sucked one and its yours, but what if you came? you technically came bec you sucked your own cock and your a straight male so youre gay right? im so confused pls help this is harder than my last year finals