I WHAT TO HAVE A CRUSH SO FUCKING BAD

Usually I'm not really bothered by the fact I can't feel romantic attraction (I'm aromantic) BUT it's just one of those nights where I'm honestly kinda annoyed rn because I want to know what a freaking crush is like also I'm fucking annoyed and low-key mad that I can't find anybody attractive like don't get me wrong i can see and understand if someone is good looking but i can't feel anything you know what I mean? Like uhhhhh idk how to explain it it's just so annoying seeing everyone talk about their crushes and saying how it makes them feel and how it makes life different and Motivates you to do much more stuff knowing damn wall I can't and never will feel that kinda feeling