Does anyone feel like theyre lagging behind than everyone else is?

Everyone else has already has some things that they wanna do and have some motivations to do things but I honestly feel so shitty and yet useless for honestly doing nothing but repeat the things ive been doing this whole summer. I had a talent for drawing or just which they said I have a talent for it but I stopped doing for a long time ago due to comparing myself through everyone elses improvement and which made me have no more motivation but yet I still feel a little jealous for everyone who draws. I am jealous of everyone which made me even jealous of my own friends. I feel so bad about myself that I cant stop myself thinking about these stuff and js keeps on comparing my life to theirs. Am I just honestly a bad person for having these thoughts which sometimes makes me resent them for it due to my jealousy? for them having such life? but then who am I to do that? I am someone who lacks motivation and confidence to do anything to improve myself which I just let someone else take that opportunity rather than them who tries for their opportunity to do something that they wanted to do.