Please help

I was recently almost robbed by a group of black guys, I didn't know that I still had kfc chicken and watermelon in my pocket but it was already too late, I didn't have that one side blade under my huge boobs so my only choice was to use what I had☹ I then unzipped my pants and struck them with my 11inch bbc cock, it was rock hard making it already weaponized but in the dark alley it was kinda hard to see, think I missed a few times but I kept on swinging for my life as it depended on the rock hardness of my heavy cock that sounded like firecrackers as I struck them successfully
( I survived but now the cops are trying to charge me with attempted m*Rd*r)

What should I do?